Is everyone ready for Teresa Giudice to continue to stir it up with Jackie Goldschneider on this week’s episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey? The bigger fireworks are likely Joe Gorga versus Joe Giudice. Old school! Is anyone wondering which man is joining Dolores Catania down the shore?
Gabby Catania arrives for a family visit and to support her mom receiving an award. How many dogs does she have? Gabby is finishing her vet school in Boston. They genuinely seem like a happy family.
Then jump to the Giudice house where Teresa is yelling for someone to help her with dinner. That voice! The girls are examining each other’s skin and pimples, and they are comparing outfits. The girls call their dad, Joe Giudice. He’s telling the girls that he is selling massagers. And Theresa jumps in that they are sex toys. And business is going so well that she’s going to join him in business. Teresa, Teresa, remember the last time you were in business with Juicy Joe…?
Teresa is planning a memorial for her dad, Giacinto Gorga at the Jersey Shore. The montage of the final weeks of his life were tough. Even in his deteriorating state, he wanted to be with his wife, Antonia Gorga. Giacinto was holding on to help take care of Teresa and her family. It was sad to hear that Teresa feels like an orphan and alone.
Dolores Catania is hosting a party for her friends after the award ceremony where she received the Pink Ambassador Hope Award for breast cancer. She’s decorated boyfriend David Principe’s home. So. Many. Flowers. David missed the award ceremony. Frank cried at the award ceremony. And David left to go back to work instead of attending the party. No surprises with any of that!
The discussion starts with Jackie’s relief at not seeing Teresa, but also Jackie’s dread that she will see Teresa for the first time at The Shore. Then everyone recaps Jennifer Aydin’s drunken face plant at the pool party. Tequila Jen says her husband washed the puke out of her hair. I’m sure he was more upset that she threw up in his Ferrari. Margaret Josephs is worried that Jen’s kids will grow up like she did, picking up drunken Marge Sr. off the floor.
Then the discussion turns to why Dolores doesn’t move into David’s house. Dolores is rationalizing and everyone knows it. Dolores shows the group her award. She gives the women a tour of the house. She shows them Frank’s surgery recovery room in David’s house. And she shows them her closet full of her dressy clothes. None of her day-to-day clothes are there. In order to keep the peace on the trip to The Shore, or attempt to, they all decide that Jackie and Evan Goldschneider are going to stay at Melissa Gorga’s shore house along with Margaret. And Teresa is going to stay at Dolores’ shore house.
These montages of the women packing for the trip and pre-gaming are the same with every trip. Maybe just film it once and insert it trip after trip? Bill Aydin tells Jennifer that Joe Benigno had heard the rumor about Evan. Bill, you probably shouldn’t have lit that fuse. Jackie shows up to ride to The Shore with Joe B and The Marge. Teresa and Jennifer hitch a ride with Dolores and Frank. Teresa tells the group that her divorce papers are being filed that day.
Jen drops a bomb in the car that Joe B. heard the same rumor about Evan. Frank is noticeably uncomfortable. He says, “What happens at guy’s night, stays at guy’s night.” Frank doesn’t want Teresa to have this ammunition. Teresa is planning to give Jackie a gift. Jen wants to know if it’s a real gift or something shady. Jen, you know the answer to that!
Joe Gorga and Melissa arrive at their shore house. They didn’t even unpack before Joe G. wants to get in a quick one before everyone shows up. Frank’s car full of girls arrive at Dolores’ shore house. Or is it Frank’s shore house? These two are so confusing. Frank’s relegated to carrying in all of the luggage. Joe G. and Joe B. unpack the car. Seeing Joe G. in Jackie’s pink hat is hilarious.
Teresa shares a moment of vulnerability in Dolores’ kitchen. She shares how her daughters feel about selling their home. Then the awkward moments begin as Teresa starts handing out “gifts?” of dildos. Then Teresa says, “It’s kinda big, Jackie. I don’t know if it’s going to fit up your ass but maybe you should try it.” Someone might just get shoved into the water here, too. Teresa thinks that if she gave a gift, that’s a nice thing.
The group starts talking about Teresa’s divorce and Teresa asks Joe Gorga and Dolores to take back what they said about Joe Giudice. Teresa says Juicy Joe was a class act. He didn’t take her money. Joe Gorga remembers that Joe Giudice wasn’t always good to his sister. Joe Gorga, Teresa, and Melissa try to shut down the conversation. Then The Marge says that she’s uncomfortable with all of these conversations/confrontations. The Marge never knows who is going to explode or who is going to cry.
Melissa makes the mistake of asking, “Does anyone have anything else they want to get off their chest?” And without even skipping a beat, Teresa asks Marge if she knows what Joe B. said at guy’s night. Joe B. remains silent, but Teresa announces that Joe B. heard the rumor about Evan, too. Marge goes after Joe B. and he denies saying it. So, Marge, the one who was most worried about who was going to freak out next, is the next to freak out. The men try to rally around each other and close ranks.
The conversation turns to who Teresa Giudice treats badly. Dolores says no. Jennifer says no. Margaret reminds Teresa about “the hair pull.” Then Melissa says Teresa called her “a stripper.” This alcohol-fueled conversation is escalating. Teresa says that she’s confident and Jackie’s not. Then Jackie says, “Did you get that confidence in jail?” Everyone should back up RIGHT NOW.
Next week, tune in for the continuation of the dinner from hell. The preview for this week teased that Joe Gorga would blow up at his sister, so that’s likely going to be part of next week’s explosive episode.
Kelli Bergheimer is an opinionated redhead, reality tv junkie, and freelance writer for All About the Tea.