Real Housewives of Potomac

‘RHOP’ RECAP: Karen Screams ‘F*CK YOU’ To The Ladies After Being Accused Of Setting Up Monique and Candiace By Inviting Them Both To Her Wig Party!

Amanda Byerly focuses on Reality TV recaps for All About The Tea. Amanda is a 30-year-old wife, mother and self-proclaimed Bravo TV junkie. When she’s not watching Bravo, she’s writing about it, reading about it, or listening to podcasts about it. “I get by with a little help from Bravo TV.”

Welcome back to an all-new episode of Real Housewives of Potomac – the one where Monique Samuels returns after a long three-episode hiatus. Let’s get started, shall we?

The episode kicks off at Karen Huger’s residence as she prepares for her wig launch party A.K.A. the “Wig Shift With a Bang Party.” There will most certainly be a big bang, that’s for sure. 

Meanwhile, across town, Ashley Darby meets Monique for lunch. During her confessional, Ashley launches into a long soliloquy about her marital problems. Apparently, since she’s been back from Portugal, things haven’t been so great at the Darby household. Surprise, surprise.

They also discuss Chase’s birthday party that Ashley didn’t get to attend – presumably due to her pressing marital issues – and Monique confesses that the Grande Dame came and had a few glasses of champagne with her. Ashley’s ears immediately perk up. “Oh really??? Cause Karen wouldn’t drink anything in Portugal because she says she has an ulcer. So does Karen not really have an ulcer???” Ashley questions. 

The topic then quickly switches to Karen’s wig party. Monique tells Ashley that she told Karen if she does come, she’ll have to come early so as not to have a run-in with Candiace Dillard-Bassett. Ashley then says that Karen told the rest of the ladies in Portugal that Monique wasn’t invited to her party. YIKES. Ashley then pulls a page out of her old book (the one before Baby Dean came along and chilled her out a bit) and calls Karen in an effort to put her on the spot and get the truth out. Karen, however, is no stranger to this game, and instead of admitting that she told all of the ladies in Portugal that Monique wasn’t invited, she simply says that Monique opted not to come herself. Sure, Jan. 

Back in lala-Robyn Dixon-land, she and her ex-husband turned soon-to-be fiancé tour new homes. Never mind the fact that she still owes a hefty sum to the IRS. Details, minor details. In her confessional, Robyn says that if she and Juan are still planning to move ahead with buying a new home, it’s time he better “sh*t or get off the pot” A.K.A. put a morganite ring on it. 

Cut to Gizelle Bryant celebrating her daughter Grace’s fifteenth birthday at a local Mexican restaurant. Gizelle promptly requests a table for four – ahem – a table for her and her three daughters’ sans her ex-husband turned new boyfriend, Jamal Bryant; Something her daughters are definitely taking delight in. The mood, however, quickly changes when Gizelle announces that Jamal will be coming to spend an entire week with them at the house.

Unfortunately, that doesn’t go over so hot with the girls. And while Gizelle definitely has her quirks, bad wardrobe, and all, she actually seems like a really good mother. So it’s really odd to see her riding so hard for her cheater, cheater pumpkin eater ex-husband while her daughters can’t make it any more apparent that they do not support her decision to rekindle a romance with him.

Back at the Huger residence, Karen is drawing a bath in an attempt to spark some romance between her and bad d*ck Ray. Ray walks into the door, armed with a bouquet of roses, and slowly saunters up the staircase, much like a prisoner heading to the electric chair. He gingerly sits down on the side of the dated bathtub while caressing his wife’s foot. They promptly shut the door, but not before Karen explains that she intends to “unplug some holes that have been plugged for a very hard time.“ I’ll let you make of that what you will….

Dr. Wendy Osefo enjoys the day with her family and her mother at the local pumpkin patch – until she drops the bad news on her mother, that is. Once Wendy has her mother alone, she seizes the moment to explain to her mother that she no longer aspires to be a professor. According to Wendy, her passions lie in being a political commentator and of course, a reality star. 

As expected, her mother, Susan, does not take the news well and even calls her a spoiled brat. SHOTS FIRED. According to Susan, all of Wendy’s achievements are because of her. “Let me tell you why I’m about to get very angry right now. You were able to achieve all of that through me lining you up on that track,” she bellows. Well… maybe her and Dave Thomas, the owner of a very popular fast-food chain, according to Wendy’s dad. Eventually, however, Susan starts speaking Wendy’s love language and tells her how proud she is of Wendy and “all four of her degrees.” All’s well that ends well, I suppose. Back to the regularly scheduled pumpkin patch pickin’.

Meanwhile, Gizelle and her three daughters head to a photo shoot. Once again, Jamal is a no-show, only the difference this time is he was actually scheduled to be there. Tisk tisk. Instead of being upset by his lack of presence, however, Gizelle presumably does what she did the entire length of their marriage and simply soldiers on. According to Jamal, he “missed his flight,” however when Gizelle Facetimes him at the photoshoot and asks him where he’s at, he replies that he’s getting a manicure at the airport. 

Later in her talking head, the producers ask Gizelle if she’s upset. “What makes you feel like I’m not???” she challenges them. “I was disappointed. What do you want me to do? Fall in the fetal position and bawl up crying? That’s just not who I am.” Cue up the awkward family photoshoot with Jamal Bryant missing in action.

Back at the Darby household, Ashley is cooking up a whole fish for not only she and Michael but also her mother and Uncle Lump. It’s finally reckoning day for ol’ Mickey Darby. Dun dun dunnnn.

Michael looks like a deer in headlights when Uncle Lump enters the residence. After giving his compliments to his niece for a wonderful dinner, he then promptly lays into Michael. Uncle Lump goes all Kris Jenner a la Tristan Thompson when he explains that when Michael hurt Ashley, he hurt their entire family. Michael, who is incapable of ever delivering a genuine apology, instead musters up an “If I hurt Ashley and I hurt you, I apologize.” And while those half-a** apologies appear to work with Ashley, Uncle Lump minces no words. “Figure it out,” he says while glaring across the table.

Finally, it’s time for what we’ve all been waiting for: The Wig Shift party. But first, hair and makeup for the Grand Dame. Once she’s ready, Karen takes one last final look around the party ensuring everything is up to her standards. While doing her final looksie, Monique walks in the door citing her earliness on another charity event she must attend. According to Monique, while it hurts that Karen lied about not inviting her to the event, she’s resolved to let her have her night and let bygones be bygones. 

Make no mistake, however, she definitely still calls her on it. Instead of going on the defense though, Karen tries her darndest to wiggle herself right out of the corner she painted herself in. “It’s a horrible position for me to be in but I can make sure all my friends are comfortable.” Karen then receives a text message from Candiace explaining she’s on her way and she immediately boots Monique right on out the door. Awkwarddddddd.

Precisely two minutes after Monique exits the building the rest of the ladies arrive. Robyn immediately takes in her surroundings and laments the fact that she’s arrived at “the back of a strip mall.” 

Candiace arrives and greets Karen with a big hug and skates right on by Ashley. The ladies question Gizelle’s whereabouts, but it’s later learned during Gizelle’s talking head that she has zero plans to attend a wig launch that Karen’s friend Steven is part of. According to Gizelle, Steven has been trolling her on social media for years. “I will NOT be attending Karen’s wig party because of her wig partner,” she declares.

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Ray enters the room and Karen can finally let out a long sigh of relief that her husband’s presence will pacify the rest of the ladies, especially after she called out Gizelle for never bringing Jamal around. PHEW!

The party starts with a video montage of Karen looking fierce in some behind-the-scenes footage of her getting ready. The ladies then take turns playing dress-up with Karen’s wigs. Everyone but Wendy, that is, who made the fatal mistake of sewing her wig down prior to the event. Oopsie daisy. I’m sure Karen was none too pleased by that. 

Karen Huger

The topic of conversation amongst the ladies quickly morphs into Karen’s lack of willingness to drink on the trip. Ashley calls Karen out for not drinking with them but later turning around and imbibing with Candiace’s sworn enemy. Anything to remove yourself from the hot seat, right Ash?!

Robyn finally asks Karen the question we’ve all been wondering, “Are you afraid of what you might say when you drink?” And those are apparently fighting words because Karen quickly swipes back, “You should be concerned with what Juan says when he’s drunk.” Ouch. 

Ashley then digs her heels in deeper when she calls Karen out for inviting Monique to the party, after all. “Monique was here???!!” Candiace screeches. The ladies then confront Karen about Monique’s presence earlier in the evening. When the ladies call her out for saying that Monique wasn’t invited, Karen promptly exits her own party but not before signing off with “I paid the bill. F*** you.” 

Ashley then takes the ladies outside and proceeds to work overtime in an effort to get back into everyone’s good graces. According to Ashley, Karen told Monique to come so that she could “stand her ground” and “speak her piece” instead of allowing everyone else to tell her story for her. Candiace also tells the ladies that Karen told her to come early to the party, insinuating that Karen planned to set her up with Monique’s presence. 

Karen Huger

The episode wraps with Wendy Four Degrees giving Candiace a lecture. “I don’t know what else you need to see. If you need Jesus Christ of Nazareth himself come tap you on your lace front, but I’m telling you right now that she is not your friend.” Hey, maybe she shouldn’t give up her day job, after all.

Tune in next week as the drama continues on the season finale!

 

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