RECAP: #SisterWives Kody Brown Scoffs At Meri & Janelle Marching In DC With Mariah and Her Girlfriend

It’s coming up rainbows on Sister Wives, and the plural fun begins with Mariah, summoning Meri and Janelle for a meeting. Mariah is rocking purple locks for the occasion, and Mare is sporting a Lula-frumpy confessional housecoat. Meri reminds us that the catfish catastrophe broke up the mother/daughter party — because putting a phantom beau before your child tends to do that. The relationship is in the healing phase, and Mariah offers a shot in the arm opportunity when she invites Janelle and Mare to participate in the Women’s March in Washington D.C..

Meri is thrilled by the relationship spark, and Janelle is immediately passionate about marching for something or other. Meri and Janelle hate each other, but are cluelessly intrigued by Mariah’s cryptic request. Protesting is Mariah’s favorite pastime, and her college gal-pals will be along for the ride. The moms hint at a girlfriend being in the mix, but Mariah immediately shifts into giddy secrecy. Meri remembers her blank shock at Mariah’s L-bomb, and wishes that she could have pulled off true joy like the others. Mariah is a lefty and Meri is a righty, but Mariah’s invite is “huge” — so Mare plans to march left to make the relationship right. 

Next, we see Kody and Aspyn return from Wyoming, after picking up the newest freeloaders — Maddie and Caleb. The couple is broke, pregnant, and moving in to mooch off Janelle. Maddie and Caleb are the golden couple, and the Browns are ready to pull out all the stops to make them comfy cozy. We learn that Caleb and Maddie are halfway through the pregnancy, and know the gender of the child. Caleb throws ungrateful shade at Vegas living, before the duo reveals that Caleb had been hospitalized for blood clot issues in his lungs. The country lovebirds want to be close to a hospital, and even closer to a TLC check.

Janelle ponders the the idea of marching with Mare, and weakly decides to go. Meri and Jenelle tell Kody about the march, and he has immediate concerns. Interestingly, Christine and Robyn are super excited to stay behind. Kody reminds his wives that they’re supposed to be fighting for plural marriage freedom in Utah, not participating in a crazy chick protest. Kody points out that gay people already have rights, and creepy cultists do not.

Kody is “in exile” because he wants to be in Utah, especially after TLC cuts them off. Kody believes that their energy should be spent elsewhere — but Meri doesn’t care, because Mariah has spoken. Kody finally caves — his dopey surrender deemed adorably charming. Christine is thrilled to be off the hook, Robyn is worried, and they’re all clueless.

Maddie and Caleb are ready to reveal the gender of their baby, and Granny Janelle is awake and ready. Christine reveals that she only experienced one ultrasound over the course of her numerous pregnancies, before the family gathers round for the big event. Maddie and Caleb decide to spill the news by forcing the family to blow themselves lightheaded into pink and blue balloons. The blue ones inflate, and the baby is declared a boy. The couple is ecstatic, and especially thrilled that they’re around lots of free babysitters. The baby’s name will be Axel James — the moniker revealed to Maddie in a dream.

It’s time for yet ANOTHER therapy session with Nancy for the dueling wives — Meri and Janelle. The conflict has been going on since forever, and it’s hard to chant about girl power with someone you detest. Meri thinks that they need to “work through” their problems (again) and Jenelle just wants a couple shots and any excuse to dodge the futile exercise. Meri explains that an interview went south when Janelle decided to hijack her airtime. Janelle objects, and says that she did nothing wrong.

Janelle notes that she would rather cancel the trip than spend one day clonking around with this media hog — pointing out that Meri would have let anyone else off the hook. Nancy informs them that they’re majoring on the minors, and nudges them to respond appropriately when they butt heads. Meri is prickly, Janelle is withdrawn, and this ongoing spin is a snooze. Meri drops that she’s feeling uncared for — and Janelle promises to amp her awareness to a semi-conscious level. Nancy can’t wait to hear the dirt on the DC trip.

Mariah and her girl crew are coming for the weekend, and Meri is busy whipping up a family breakfast to celebrate. The girls will be along for the march, and the family is taking bets about which stranger is the girlfriend. The group arrives, and Mariah gives her mother the side-eye as they discuss the upcoming march. Mariah looks like she’s dying for Meri to slip up, but Meri doesn’t bite. Meri asks for a preview of Mariah’s not-so-secret reveal, hoping that the whole birth thing might score her a courtesy, before the family mobs her wet bar. Mariah and her gaggle giggle awkwardly, before Mariah spills that she’s dating the chick to her right.

Meri plays it cool as a cucumber, and is kind and supportive. In an interesting twist, Mariah appears the most uncomfortable. Mariah refutes that assessment in a personal interview — where she shares that while Audrey is only her second dip in any dating pool, she is the clear winner. The family troops in, and senses that a mystery lesbian is among them. Mariah drags Kody and her other mommies outside, and confirms that Audrey is the it-girl. The ladies are overjoyed, and Kody plays along with a clunky comedic comeback. Janelle labels the spectacle the most “different” thing she’d ever seen, but assures viewers that she’s emotionally cool and hip to the scene. One of the enlightened college feminists offers plural love analysis — and exposes herself as a complete dolt, while cheering the harem.

The D.C. trip looms and Janelle has the jitters, because angry females are pretty scary. Mare’s friends are warning her about the crowds, and she confesses that she knows nothing about the march or the stupid politics that are heating up the country. TLC jumps us to Washington, as Christine spills that Meri and Janelle don’t travel well. The two sets of gals meet up for dinner, and everyone is excited about the event. Meri still has no idea what she signed up for. 

TLC captures footage of the march, and Meri is shocked by all of the “angry energy.” Janelle is taking in the action, but the estrogen fueled fury is giving her anxiety. Mariah and Audrey call the spectacle “beautiful” and TLC illustrates by featuring a sign with the word “urine” on it. Two of the girls have disappeared into a sea of tacky signs, so Mariah and Audrey smoothly plant their own boards on Meri and Janelle’s lumpy midriffs.

Meri and Janelle excuse themselves to hit the bathroom, and successfully foil Mariah’s plot. Three hours later the groups reunite, and the wives fake enough enthusiasm to get through the day. Janelle declares that a woman can be both a feminist and a sluggish concubine — and the duo adds that they’re happy that they kept their snarky venom under control. Meri later corners Mariah and Audrey, hoping to get to know them better as a couple.

Audrey shares about her coming out experience, and Meri admits that this was not the future she pictured for her own daughter. Meri feels gypped out of a son, and it’s taken time to adjust to her new reality. The chitchat goes well, and Meri is encouraged.

Evidently, February is march month, because next week, the Browns clonk around the Utah capitol.

 

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