Gobble, gobble! It’s Thanksgiving time on the Shahs of Sunset, but before we cut the turkey, we join Mike and Reza who are walking their dogs, contemplating life. Mike drops a bombshell that he’s not yet divorced. He calls it: almost divorced. Reza can’t believe his ears because he circled the date on his calendar. The delay isn’t because they are reconsidering the divorce, or so Mike says. Regardless, Reza is pushing for Mike to dip his dool in the dating pool.
Next, we join GG who is at a dildo store taking a course on how to give a proper blowjob. GG says she’s not a total frigid bitch, but her gag reflexes kick in whenever she does the deed. Adam is also taking the course, but let’s face it, he could probably teach it. Before the class begins they discuss Asa and how GG has tried to reach out to her, but is always dismissed with one or two words.
We interrupt this drama to discuss the proper techniques for blowjobs. First question: what are your hang ups? Adam has none. GG has many. Let me just leave you with this: play the instrument like it’s a harmonica.
Moving on, it’s the day before Thanksgiving and every year MJ and Reza feed the needy. This year the rest of the group has shown up to help. Asa asks MJ to pull back her hair so it’s not an extra flavor added to the stuffing. MJ is like, Oh I’m good enough to touch your hair but not good enough to trust. But she does it anyway. They are serving what looks like burritos. Who needs turkey anyway? Asa is really trying to connect with MJ, but MJ ain’t having it. Off to the side, GG tells Shervin she doesn’t know if she should invite her sister Leila to the Thanksgiving dinner at his house. Her parents will be dining there and GG and Leila fight like it’s a cock fight. That said, GG’s anger management will be tested. Shervin encourages GG to invite her sister. In her text, GG tells Leila to do it for their dad and they don’t have to talk. Can you feel the Thanksgiving?
At the Middle Eastern grocery store, Mike and Asa are buying their desserts because who cares that when you make something from scratch it’s made with love. Asa tells Mike she is really sad because the group has not been supportive of her
bastard pregnancy. Mike thinks Asa is projecting and creating her own reality. Case in point, when MJ was crying about her dad dying, all Asa did was take selfies of the food. Asa says she didn’t hear this, but that’s not true because Asa said she was tired of MJ’s tears. Mike tells Asa she’s effed up for not admitting to MJ about going to the same doctor at the same time for the same reason. Asa says her relationship with Jermaine Jackson is off limits because he’s extremely private. Mike informs her that the gossip is from her bestie Reza and he’s just the messenger.
GG is back at the hearing doctor with her parents and MJ to get her hearing aids. The tiny yellow instrument is inserted into each ear. GG talks and is caught off guard by how loud her voice is. She wants to cry and puke at the same time. The doctor tests her again and hallelujah, she can hear! But GG keeps talking very loud and her parents have to tell her to shut up. Thank you.
Happy Thanksgiving! MJ goes to Shervin’s house early to help decorate and of course her boobs are hanging out. Mike does not want them on the menu, but MJ explains she can’t button the shirt because it’s too small and/or she’s too big. MJ is sad she won’t be dining with her dad, but I’m sure the face-time conversation meant the world to him. MJ quietly asks Shervin if everything is okay with Annalise. He tells her yes, and if she brings it up, MJ can walk out the door.
Asa is having dinner with her folks and Reza and Adam arrive with food and flowers. Asa has just returned from her doctor’s office who wrote her prescription for a toxic free Thanksgiving. Something like, take two turkey legs and call him in the morning. Outside, Asa tells Reza about the conversation with Mike. Reza confirms it’s true. He said it and he regrets being in the middle of this mess. Asa explains it’s not her fault that MJ is hurt. They hug and make up – or do they? Asa says she may forgive, but she never forgets and Reza just wants to get through the dinner.
People are starting to show up at Shervin’s house. MJ is upset she doesn’t have a proper bra (or any bra) and her mom is going to get mad. Good! GG and Annalise go outside and Shervin is worried about what they’re discussing. GG tells Annalise she loves Shalom so much, this scares her. Annalise says she is never scared with her love for Shervin because there is a lesson in everything, said the fortune cookie. GG tells Annalise there are rumors about Shervin. Shervin tries to interrupt, but Annalise says she believes Shervin 150% because she is the polar opposite of GG and doesn’t let fear control her. Later, these words will need some gravy to help Annalise eat them.
Shalom and GG’s mom and dad arrive and the gang is all there – except Leila. She was unable to make it this year, says dad. But wait, guess who walks in with store bought food just when they sit down to eat? Leila. Will it be a peaceful Thanksgiving? Oh hell no. But they try. Through tears GG says she’s thankful to Leila for showing up for their dad. Let’s eat.
Before dinner is finished, Leila goes outside to smoke a cigarette. Shervin follows her and Leila rips apart her “fake,” sister GG and her “fake” toast. Leila tells Mike she is here as a favor to her dad, then calls Mike a jerk for mocking her. Leila is jealous because growing up GG got more attention for being bad. MJ and her boobs go outside to insert themselves into this drama, but Mike tells the three of them to stay out of it. Finally they all chill out and go back inside.
Back at Asa’s parents’ house nothing is happening. Asa begins her prayer thanking her wonderful baby and her absentee boyfriend wonderful family. Reza isn’t feeling it because the rug has been pulled out from under their friendship and he wants to fly that rug home.
Back at Shervin’s house, bitter Leila is showing her dad texts messages that prove GG once waited 11 days to say thank you for something. The horror! Her dad is like, Hey, at least she said thank you. GG walks up and it’s on. She pushes MJ away and starts yelling at Leila that she will bust her out. Leila announces to everyone that this is the rehab GG. And GG is like, Yeah it is, bitch. Meanwhile their dad and mom want to melt into oblivion. Leila says she’s leaving, but then she doesn’t. Leila and Shalom play a game that looks like backgammon and the bi-polar evening flips to happy times.
Tune in next time when MJ finally remodels her condo and Tommy walks out.
I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run.