We’re back for part two of The Real Housewives of Potomac reunion – and it’s a spectacle. The two-part reunion concludes with a mixture of insults and apologies when the husbands join the ladies on stage, except for Charrisse’s soon-to-be-ex, Eddie, he’s a no-show. In fact, it’s kind of funny because Juan is all by himself on the right side while Chris, Michael and Ray are together on the left side, like Juan is contagious or something. And maybe Juan is sick because word on the street is he almost didn’t make it to the reunion. Juan was worried that since he finally got a job (Yay! He’s bringing home a paycheck!) he’s worried being on a show like this could cause him to lose it. He shoots, he scores!
Andy begins by telling Ray he won’t be calling him the black Bill Gates, because he’s not. Anyway, Andy tells him the house move while Karen was in Bermuda seemed a little sketchy. Ray explains their house was on the market for over a year. And how can we forget, it was a cash sale. Ray says he was excited to downsize until his wife decided to move her sick parents in – which is called being a good daughter. And for the record, Ray thinks Uncle Ben is a handsome dude and hasn’t been broke since he was 17.
Onto Chris and his mom calling his wife Monique a “heifer.” How embarrassing! Chris and Monique didn’t hear it at the time, but the mics picked it up, and as you can imagine, this puts Chris in a difficult position – mom vs wife. Chris did have a talk with his mama and she apologized – just not to Monique because she’s not going to apologize to that heifer. Chris’ mama has yet to visit the Potomac house.
Next up, Juan and the secretly recorded conversation in the closet between him and the producer. Juan said if it weren’t for his kids, he’d bail. Andy asks if Juan he was relieved to finally get that out. Juan says no. He was tired. He didn’t want to film that day. And he loves Robyn unconditionally. (Actually it’s Robyn who loves Juan unconditionally.) Juan says they talk about everything – except a romantic future. He and Robyn don’t like to talk about important stuff like that. Andy puts Juan on the spot and asks him if he regrets how he treated his marriage and all the cheating on Robyn. Juan tells Andy, “I’m not gonna let you paint the picture like this was all on Juan Dixon.” Sigh. Juan is one of those people who speaks of himself in the third person. Juan says they have each learned their lessons. However, does Juan want passion and with the promise of new romance? Hell yes, Juan does! Juan is counting down the days, but for now Juan is focusing on his family and Juan ain’t in no rush to figure things out. Robyn says their two sons, aged 9 and 7, are better off being in a two-person household, even if those two people aren’t in love, aren’t affectionate, and aren’t trying.
Speaking of bad marriages, Michael and Ashley are up next! Once upon a time they were humping like rabbits, now they are like rabbits who hate each other. And hold onto your blooming onion because they’ve been separated for three months! Ashley admits the flashbacks are hard to watch, but not Michael, he’s older and wiser and older. Gizelle and Robyn are practically drooling for more information and say they sensed the separation was coming. Duh. All of America sensed it. From now on the divorce girls club is formed and they will have Ashley’s back. Michael’s like, Yeah, you’ll have a knife in Ashley’s back.
A viewer asks why not shut the restaurant down and save the marriage. Ashley explains it’s not that easy because lots of money goes into a restaurant. Of course, lots of money goes into a divorce, too. Ashley admits she was the one to move out, but praise the Lord, she just had an epiphany to get back together, like ten minutes ago. Michael’s like, Not so fast, young blood. Ashley is 28 and just figuring out life and Michael is 56 and already given up. Gizelle thinks Michael wants to set Ashley free, and I kind of agree with her.
Andy says goodbye to the men and now wants to talk about the haves and haves not of Potomac with regards to party budgets, but winds up talking about Karen’s boobs. Seems as if Karen might have been caught in a fib. She said her boobs were smaller because she lost weight. Andy is like, No freaking way. Karen finally admits she took out her implants and put in smaller ones. Andy’s like, Girl, I knew you didn’t lose that much weight.
So what’s the status of Charrisse’s marriage? It’s officially in the crapper. Charrisse filed the paperwork and the divorce process has begun. Good news for Charrisse, they don’t have prenup. As for Eddie and his new girlfriend, Charrisse will just drink her champagne and go on Love Connection and make a fool of herself. Ashley says she’s heard that Charrisse has been having sex toy parties – like that’s any kind of big deal. Girl, please. If you’re coming to the dance you need to bring your good shoes.
Next, flashbacks are shown of the Bermuda trip, specifically why Karen had a bug up her ass about receiving Charrisse’s help planning the damn thing. Karen explains that our perception is not reality. But seriously, who gives a damn how many names are on a gift basket? Karen goes for the jugular and mention Charrisse’s fireman – and she has receipts!
Charrisse turns the firehose on Karen and accuses her of having a boyfriend called, “Blue Eyes.” Karen explains Blue Eyes is her security detail – who happens to be eye candy. But here’s the shade, Karen says she’s above the other women because her money is not sports money.
For some reason, the phrase, “Gizelle is not a liar” keeps getting repeated. Maybe I fell asleep, I’m not sure. Gizelle tells Karen it’s not a good look to be seen time and again with Blue Eyes instead of her husband. Karen says Gizelle would throw Jesus under the bus and her dating three men doesn’t look good either.
And that’s the end. Can I get an amen! Andy asks how everyone feels. Karen says she feels great. Monique says she feels good about where she and Gizelle are at. Gizelle says her biggest regret is storming into Oz and she feels happy where she and Charrisse are at. They kiss. It’s awkward. Robyn doesn’t feel like there was any resolution this season. Ashley says she has a prenup and will be fine either way. Charrisse tells the biggest lie and says she has no hostility for any of the ladies. There is no champagne toast at the end. Speaks volumes.
So, what did you think about this season’s Real Housewives of Potomac? Will they be back for another season? Will you tune in if they do? Thanks for all the comments and for keeping it fun.
I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run.