#RHONY Recap: Carole Freaks Out While Watching Election Results!

The Real Housewives of New York begins with Carole, flushed with red, white and blue excitement, driving with her mom to Pennsylvania to stomp the streets for Hillary. The ladies chat away about their mission to win over PA, and Carole grabs a camera opportunity to snipe at the enemy candidate. Carole and her mom peddle their “Up with Hill—Down with Buffoon” message door-to-door, swapping anecdotes about the good ol’ Girl Scout cookie days. Next, we catch up with Ramona, who is undergoing a facial zap to celebrate her own 60 is the new 30 campaign. She shares that her breathtaking reflection regularly stuns her, and that she just adores that 20-something beauty, giving her a bug-eyed wink back. We get a closeup of Ramona’s burned off face, as she bores us with more yammer about her teen-like vivaciousness. Carole and her mama take a break, while Carole  shares details about her compassionate political background. Carole breaks the news that her main squeeze is moving out — and that their super hip shack-up is coming to an end. Adam is great with the critters, but has clearly worn out his welcome. Carole’s mom doesn’t care, because due to her daughter’s extreme coolness, she had not yet met Adam.

We next join Sonja and her friend, Rocco, enjoying a night out. The duo enjoys such “outings,” but Sonja admits that her latest lover is giving Rocco a run for his money. Frenchie is the hottie but Rocco has the cash, so it’s the best of both worlds. Sonja whines to her date about Tinsley being déclassé and not card-considerate. Rocco agrees, strokes her arm, and  wistfully dreams of more.

We shift over to Dorinda and Luann, who are meeting up for a shopping jaunt. Luann dishes that Tom is scoring a Rolex for puttin’ a murky yellow ring on it, and because she only votes for love, she’ll be skipping Carole’s doomsday shindig. Dorinda reveals that she’s luring Ramona to the venue with the irresistible scent of hot men, and trusts that the cast will keep their yappers shut.

It’s the big night, and Carole is so excited that she wants to puke. Republicans are invited to her party, and she’s looking forward to entertaining them with her victory dance. Adam can’t wait for Carole to shut up already, and hopes that the campaign finale will do the trick. Meanwhile, Bethenny warns her guests that Carole is a big donkey, but because they’re all with her—-they’re excited for a historic night. Carole jabbers nervously, and hopes that her two hours in Pennsylvania secured the win. Meanwhile, panic sets in with Bethenny’s group, as they all walk to the event. Heather Thomson makes an appearance, and the ex reality sisters nervously wring their hands—desperate for a happy ending. Dorinda shows up, rocking a mean pantsuit for the occasion. A scraggly deplorable joins the party—and appears to be the only one having fun. Bethenny chatters away, and we learn that she will pass on the celebrating Ramona’s birthday. Carole’s nervousness turns to nausea, as her worst nightmare comes true.

Carole is devastated, dumbfounded, and on her way to drunkenness in the wake of the Trump victory. She weeps on camera and admits she was wrong, but knows that history will prove that she really did know more than Ramona.

More important things are on the agenda, because Ramona is shopping for a sexy birthday dress. Carole chimes in via a confessional, shading Ramona’s trivial mirror fondling as an ignorance reveal — especially frustrating during her time of mourning. Carole tries on a sizzler, and Ramona thinks that she looks smokin’ hot — so hot that Bravo has to blur a nipple. Ramona gives a cougar rawr, and Carole cringes, obviously not thrilled by her elderly approval. They chat about Ramona’s porn spat with Bethenny, and Carole reminds her that all things Bryn are off limits. Ramona accuses Carole of shutting her out of her party to keep the B-I happy, but Carole assures her that the event was a bust. Ramona mentions her upcoming birthday plans, and Carole stumbles for words, almost blowing the surprise.

We jump to Sonja’s, where she and Tinsley are getting little-black-dress ready for the party. Ramona is also at home, glued to her mirror — and is evidently double-booked for a night on the town. She has a date and lots of alternative prospects lined up, and is ready to swan dive into a testosterone smorgasbord.

The scene is set for Ramona’s party, complete with anonymous servers mysteriously blinking through glittery butterfly masks. The guests begin to trickle in — but uptown, Ramona is in a heated hissy because Dorinda is late. Ramona grabs another ride, and Dorinda complains that Ramona’s sexual schedule might have messed up her own party. Sonja, Tinsley, and Luann arrive, and Dorinda is stressed that she might not pull off her plan. Ramona makes it, the guests cheer, and she theatrically falls to the ground, overwhelmed by her dazzling popularity. Good-time Harry makes an appearance, and the ladies titter about the flashback. Sonja sighs at her ongoing plight — and is just sick to death of sharing her lovers. Ramona’s date calls in, and Ramona agrees to pencil him into her party, as soon as she can recall his name. Sonja shades Tinsley for being inconsiderate of her needs, and Tinsley snarks back that her curls prove that she’s not a common intern. Ramona’s date appears, and awkwardly tries to jump into the Bravo flow. Ramona blows him off, he wanders away, and the scene is painful. Luann slinks out, right as Ramona hears that Bethenny bailed on her again. Sonja and Ramona steal a moment alone, and Ramona whines about Bethenny being a no-show. Sonja points out that kids are off-limits, even the children of witchy porn stars. The ladies shriek at the skyline, and Ramona blows out her candle and calls it a night.

Next week, we get our first glimpse of Luann in a wedding dress, and Ramona corners Bethenny into a forced convo.

 

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