Below Deck

‘Below Deck’ Recap: Kate Chastain Has Reached Resting Bitch Face Code Red

Recap by guest blogger J.R.

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Kate and I both start off this episode of Below Deck, the same way, complaining about the end of this charter season. She feels like the crew has given up, and I’m going to have to agree with her. Not fun for her to work with, not fun for us to watch. I mean I guess hers might be worse, but picture this, me watching this, and like an amateur forgetting snacks. So you know, I’m gonna call this one a tie. We both suffered in different ways tonight, who’s to really say who suffered more.

It’s the last charter and the guests are simple enough. They’re having a photo shoot on the first day and want a dinner for Dawn, the charter guest, for putting the charter all together. Kate starts feeling nostalgic for it all ending. Those feelings won’t last.

When preparing for the guests, Captain Lee speaks to the deck crew to make the light suggestion to talk to guests out of using the pool, cause he sees how they’ve been struggling with it at all season, and he knows there’s no hope for them now. He’s not asking for the deck crew to manipulate their guests but……. They know they need to turn to Kate for this.\

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And then there’s Sierra and Emily. I was hoping this moment would never come. As a woman, I was rooting for all the women on this show. They all seemed intelligent, capable of their jobs, and hardworking. Lauren checked out a while ago, so I had time to process and grieve that loss. But Sierra and Emily, it happened so quickly I must admit I didn’t see it coming. All the signs were there, but I was naïve. Kate says they have senioritis, which is the most accurate description for it. They don’t even have college senioritis.

College senioritis, you’re tired. You get a little lazy, but you know you have a 30-page paper due Monday and need to keep up your GPA to get a job so can’t fully slack off. At most, college senioritis just means you cry a little less because you know it’s almost over. But no, they have high school senioritis. High school senioritis is completely different. You’ve already been accepted into school, if that’s the path you’ve chosen to take, or know where you’re traveling, or working, or don’t have a clue but it doesn’t matter because you’re 17 and you think you have all the time in the world. You show up, just to say you’re there, but nothing matters. What I’m basically getting at is Emily and Sierra are being lazy and entitled, a super cute, winning combination.

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One of many issues is their radios. Kate specifically asks her stews to make sure the radios are on them at all times. Kelley has this same speech with his crew, but Emily, Sierra, and Lauren only take it as a suggestion. Shortly after, Kate is calling for Emily, who’s busy making out with Ben, and Kelley is calling for Lauren who is doing – what exactly? Both don’t answer.

Emily finally realizes Kate is calling her and goes to find her, without her radio. Emily asks if she should go get it. You think? Kate asks her to treat her radio like a baby. Well considering Kate is starting to babysit them on the job, maybe they’re too young for a baby of their own. For some reason Emily is the one who is annoyed by all this. Yes, it must be exhausting for you to be constantly told to do the job you’re not doing, just ask Kelley.

The guests are arriving soon and Kelley asks Kate how to best manipulate their guests into not using the pool. She tells him to let them know they have it, but that they don’t really need it since it’s more for babies and old people. I so thought Kelley was going to mess this up, but when the guests come on-board they’re happy to just use the slide and other toys for later on, no pool necessary.

Inside, Sierra loses her radio. Wow. So Kate ties it her wrist. Sierra promptly rips it off and Kate literally follows her around the yacht to tie it back on her. Kate wants the message to sink in.

It’s lunch and Ben is serving a broccoli, asparagus, and cucumber salad. Not underwhelming at all. So nobody cares? As the guests eat they lecture each other on how great they are. When one of the guests goes to the Dominican Republic she doesn’t even stay at a resort. She goes to tin shacks where people are actually laying on cardboard, and it’s the coolest thing. Poverty is cool? Then they clap for her. No, really. Watching privilege is weird.

Below Deck Season 4

Lauren is on her break, but is on deck, so the crew asks what she’s up to. She says nothing, just getting air. Right. They know she’s looking for her radio, since Kelley has it tied to his back. Nico radios for Lauren, in front of Lauren, and they all watch Kelley answer it. They all laugh.

Seeing this, Sierra realizes she doesn’t have her radio, which she knows she left in the laundry room. Instead of keeping on her, like she’s actually supposed to. She picks up Kyle’s that’s on the table directly in front of him. He snaps at her that that’s his and she calls him a child. Kyle calls her a f****** dick and she storms off. Nobody laughs.

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Kelley immediately tells Kyle to just be the bigger person and go apologize to her, he doesn’t. A few minutes later he asks again. While pleading with him to do so, he sees Sierra and attempts to apologize on Kyle’s behalf. Sierra argues with Kelley, calling him rude, and storms off…again. Living up to that last name. She goes to vent to Kate, who could not care less since she’s actually working. She starts talking about Kelley, saying he overreacts before he comes crawling back asking for forgiveness. Kelley overhears this and assures her, she’s not getting an apology. At least the guests enjoyed their dinner.

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The next morning, while the guests are having breakfast, Sierra asks Kate if she should clean the cabins. I would love to know the answer she was expecting. “You know Sierra, you’ve done them every charter without having to ask me and this is the last one anyway, so you know what, eff it, leave their rooms dirty, who cares.” Like yeah Sierra, go clean. Sierra has gone full circle in Kyle’s eyes. The girl he once called absolutely stunning, he now calls absolutely mental. There’s no hope for these two together, and there might not be hope for them separately either, they’re both pretty childish. 

Kate speaks to Emily in the kitchen and reminds her about service. Just because these guests don’t have high maintenance standards like Dean on last charter, doesn’t mean they should slack. Ben interjects and thanks her for the reminder since they were all planning to do a really bad service. Emily wisely leaves. And Kate is pissed and Ben is pissed that Kate is pissed. He whines that he just won’t talk anymore. Good plan. Especially since, as Kate tells him, she was neither facing nor talking to him.

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I tried to give everyone a shot, but I think it’s confirmed – Kate is the only sane one on this show. Wishing her and us luck for next week’s season finale!

 

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