Tonight was a wild ride on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen. Real Housewives of Orange County’s Vicki Gunvalson and Sonja Morgan from the Real Housewives of New York whooped it up.
Andy dug up an Instagram pic of Vicki with Luann de Lesseps and her drunk ex, Rey Bolic. The same man who got kicked out of Dorinda Medley and John’s dry cleaning party. Vicki gave Andy the scoop.
“Luann and I got in a fight that night, because she thought I wanted him. I’m like, ‘I don’t want him, he’s yours.’ Like I just met him. She got mad. I don’t know who he is, but she’s like, ‘Keep your hands off of him.’ I don’t want him. He was over me, all over me. She’s like, ‘We’re going. Right now.’ Who is he?”
“Oh honey, there’s not even time in the night. He blew up the dry cleaning party.”
Sonja chimes in:
“He was at the Shannon theater and I [sic] one night with Dr. Nassif.”
Andy’s eyes nearly popped out of his head.
“Paul Nassif? You and Shannon Beador?”
Then Vicki butted in.
“She ended up leaving with Paul.”
Andy cut in:
“Wait! Who left with Paul? Luann?”
Sonja and Vicki talked over each other. Apparently Vicki, Shannon, Paul, Rey, and Luann all went out one night, but Vicki refused to spill the tea and tell who left with Paul.
“I’m not saying any rumors.”
“Tell the truth!”
Vicki finally admitted:
“She kind of left with Paul.”
Andy asked again, “Who? Luann?”
Vicki confirmed it. Luann left with the former Mr. Maloof! Scandalous! Could he be the new Slade Smiley? Or maybe the old Slade Smiley is the new Thomas D’Agostino. Either way, Andy was shocked.
“After that guy [Rey] didn’t want anything to do with her…I’m like, ‘I don’t know what’s going on, and I’m going back to my room.’ But he was like, ‘I want your number. I think you’re beautiful.’ Luann, you can have him. I’m good.”
Andy asked who Rey wound up going home with that night. Vicki spun toward Sonja and asked, “Did he go home with you?”
“I did not have sexual relations with that man.”
This was all in the first five minutes of the show, people!
Andy wanted more details about Lu and Dr. Nassif. But Sonja flipped the subject.
“I’ve already been on the cover of Rey’s magazine. I thought Lu was dating him to get on the cover of the magazine, but I’ve already been on it.”
Sonja said the name of the magazine is Millennium.
Back to tonight’s RHOC episode. The ladies traumatized the land of Ireland with their antics. Kelly kept flicking people in the nose, and Tamra Judge told the secret she’d been keeping for Kelly. Things got crazy from there. Vicki remained neutral.
“I purposefully stayed neutral because I really love Kelly, and I was trying to get back in the social graces with all the other women, so for me it was a good place to stay. I’m out of it…it has nothing to do with me.”
Andy asked Sonja and Vicki how they would have reacted to certain situations if they’d swapped places. For instance, would Sonja have been upset if her friends hadn’t come to see her post dune buggy accident?
“I’m pretty happy when my friends don’t come to see me looking like that.”
Would Vicki have been upset if her friend stole her booty call and then got engaged to him?
“Obviously he wasn’t for me. Next. There are a lot of men out there.”
Would Sonja turn down a happy ending at the end of a massage?
“My daughter’s in the audience.”
What if Vicki had been disinvited to the Berkshires?
“I’m going out with my other friends, then. I really don’t care. Like, next.”
What if David Beador called Sonja a pig?
“That is not what a man does, no. I wouldn’t deal with that. I would make sure not to be anywhere around him again.”
What if Vicki had to break the news about Tipsy Girl to Bethenny Frankel?
“I wouldn’t have liked it. I would have had a conversation with her ahead of time, probably.”
Sonja gave the scoop on Luann’s wedding shower. She got the dates mixed up and showed up with Saran Wrap on her feet.
“Like a homeless person. I received the first invitation through a paperless post — I had to say that. And it said it was 11a.m. on a certain date, and then the second one came in and said it was the night before. So I just didn’t bother to change it in the calendar. And so I was having a pedicure/manicure, and I kept getting these texts — where are you, where are you. Oh, shock. So I ran over there from the pedicure with the Saran Wrap.”
Jill Zarin was also a guest.
“Yes, she was there. She was getting along with everyone. And Dorinda was there, whom I’m not speaking with. But only Dorinda and I were invited from the show.”
Andy asked why Sonja was blanking Dorinda.
“Because she’s just totally duplicitous, lied about everything. And she’s a total fake. That’s why.”
A caller wanted to know if Sonja was mad that Dorinda accused her of doing drugs.
“I never get mad when people accuse me of doing drugs.”
“Sweetie, it’s the opposite. It was Dorinda who got mad at you for saying that everyone knows she does drugs.”
Sonja swung her leg and didn’t even appear flustered.
“Oh, yeah! I don’t think Dorinda likes that very much, but you know, everyone knows, so I didn’t see what the harm was.”
We got to see a sneak peek of next week’s RHOC episode. Before the ladies leave Ireland, another argument occurs. Tamra sends a text to Kelly, confronting her about rumors Vicki had spread. Apparently, Kelly is talking shit about Tamra, and Ms. Judge has had enough. They all argue in the hotel hallway while Heather films it on her phone. When the women get on the shuttle to head to the airport, Shannon gets in the mix. She also claims Vicki has been talking about Kelly behind her back.
During the show, Vicki got a text from her friend in Chicago.
“When we were out, I got it mixed up. It was Sonja that left with Paul Nassif, not Luann.”
Sonja said to Vicki:
“You’re the only person who doesn’t know that, but that’s okay.”
Andy looked at the camera. “I may not have known that.”
Sonja waved him off. “You knew about Paul.”
Realization dawned on Andy. “Oh, yeah! Maybe I did.”
Sonja went on:
“Shannon got up in the DJ booth. Rey was there, and Luann was there. But nothing happened. I did not have sexual relations with that man. But I did get some nice facial products from him.”
I’ll let you make your own inappropriate joke.
A caller pointed out that in the past, Tamra has spoken about Slade’s kids. Does Vicki think Tamra’s being hypocritical?
“Yes, I mean obviously, yes. She talks about everybody’s families, everybody’s kids, everybody’s everything, but the minute you talk about her, her family, her kids, her husband, she goes crazy.”
Vicki denied that she started the fight at the pub crawl. Sure, she was annoyed at Kelly, but she didn’t want to start a fight.
Back to New York gossip. Evidently, Dorinda hit some guy in the Regency with a shoe. A caller wanted more info. Sonja laughed.
“I’ve always said, everything comes out in the wash, doesn’t it? Once a hypocrite, always a hypocrite. First of all, Sylvester, the one that they quoted…he’s a friend of mine for over thirty years. He’s a very uptight banker, so I feel bad he had to be in the middle of the scene. But Dorinda went from one drunken lunch to the next thing at the Regency in the middle of the day.”
Andy asked the obvious question. Do these people ever go anywhere besides the Regency?
“My daughter grew up going to the Regency for very special events, like Sunday brunch…you don’t go to the Regency and make out with people, like Luann’s fiancé. Or take your heels off and spike someone in the head. That’s not what you do at the Regency.”
Does Sonja really think Luann and Tom will make it down the aisle?
“Oh, I’m pretty sure. She’s going to make sure, hell or high water, that’s happening. She could probably catch me with Tom and still marry him. It’s happening.”
Andy tried to smooth things over by saying:
“But she would never catch you with Tom, of course.”
Sonja coyly replied:
“I never get caught…Never, no! No one would ever know I was with Tom for the last decade if Luann didn’t fish in the same pond.”
Andy tried to clarify. “No, but you wouldn’t be with him because he’s with—,”
“Because she’s my friend! But then Luann goes out with all my boyfriends, and that’s okay.”
When Shannon and Tamra frisked Vicki’s new boyfriend, that had to be uncomfortable.
“It comes with the territory. I pre-warned him, ‘The girls might interrogate you because I’ve had a past of picking bad people.’ He was okay with it. It was awkward because it was date three.”
Vicki’s still with Steve, and claimed that God and her mom sent him to her.
“My tank is full.”
Vicki gave an update on her daughter, Briana.
“She’s been diagnosed, and we’re not going to talk about it tonight. But yes, she’s getting better.”
The night’s poll question asked if the fans were on Kelly’s side or everyone else’s. The other OC ladies won at 60%.
Vicki admitted at the last minute that she made a mistake.
“Good for Kelly. You know what, she holds her own. I should have gone the other side, but I just didn’t, I got scared. Whatever. I love her.”
So, should Vicki have at least consoled Kelly instead of leaving it to Shannon? And who was to blame for tonight’s pub brawl — Tamra or Kelly?
I’m a fiction writer by day and a reality TV addict by night.