‘Little Women LA’ Recap: Briana & Tonya Face Off Over Briana’s Parenting Abilities

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All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

We resume this week’s episode of Little Women right smack dab in the middle of the belly-dancing smack down from last week. Everyone is all involved in what Tonya said about being glad Briana wasn’t having an average sized-child. Tonya isn’t having any of it and walks off. Bye, Zen bitches! Terra waddles after Tonya to tell her to chill out and own up to her rude-ass comment. Tonya explains it’s not about Briana being little, it’s about Briana’s whack family dynamics. True dat. Tonya says she’ll talk to Briana, just not today.

Over at Christy’s house, Autumn is putting makeup on her grandmother. Sorry, Autumn, makeup artistry is not your thang. Christy says the docs did a full blood panel on Autumn to find out what’s going on with her health. It’s either her thyroid or hormones. Christy’s mom recommends yet again that she work out her issues with the other girls, but Christy thinks the other girls should apologize to her as well for calling her Crusty the pill-popping clown.

All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

Terra and Joe still don’t know if they’re having a pseudo or average baby and won’t know until the baby is born. Terra has a lot going on. She’s packing and moving to a new home. She’s going on Dancing With the Stars. And Joe is going out of the country and won’t be back until two days before the baby will be born. The Bickerson’s argue about this for a while and then Joe promises not to miss the big event even though he’s going to miss Terra’s pre-op appointment.

Grandma Olivia is back to help with Penny. She’s on board with Joe leaving town to make money because he’s got diapers to buy. Grandma Olivia leaves and Terra goes into worry-mode that something bad is going to happen while Joe is away. Then Joe leaves a tearful, emotional, worried Terra – and he’s probably grateful to have this last-minute gig in Tijuana.

All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

Over at Elena’s house, her mom is packing to leave and through very fast subtitles, Elena tells her mom what a huge help she’s been and how will she manage without her. At least I think that’s what Elena said. So far she and Preston have not had the babies genetic testing conducted, but Xavier is growing slightly faster than Cairo. At some point, Elena says they will do it, just not today.

Tonya comes through for Terra and goes to her pre-op appointment with her since Joe is out-of-town. Tonya is wearing blue lipstick. Girl, blue lips are for dead people. Wash that off. The doctor checks out Terra and everything seems to be going well, until Terra asks to keep the placenta. Tonya is grossed out. The doctor says it’s called placenta encapsulation when it’s put into pill form, but Terra wants it in the raw form to make a milkshake. I’m pretty sure the doctor was grossed out, too. Then as the doctor is about to leave the exam room, Terra tells him about her right breast that is leaking blood. Why didn’t Terra mention this first? The doctor examines it and says it’s most likely benign, but with so much going on right now, he recommends they deal with this later.

All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

Later that evening, Tonya invites Briana and Jasmine over for pasta de’ apology. But before that, Tonya shares with the girls that Terra had a bleeding breast at today’s appointment. Okay, now let’s eat. Tonya then explains to Briana that she wasn’t trying to attack her character as a mom. She was attacking Matt’s character and how he treats her. Briana somewhat accepts this apology, but Jasmine wants an apology too because she was equally offended. Seriously? Tonya reiterates that the comment wasn’t about a little person, it was about a loser boyfriend. So no apology for Jasmine today.

Christy invites Jasmine to lunch because Jasmine is the only person who will take her calls. She tells Jasmine about Autumn’s health problems and her dad’s contained throat cancer. Jasmine asks how Christy is coping and the answer to that is: not very well. Jasmine tells Christy that she was horrible, scary, and evil on the boat trip. Christy admits hitting her breaking point and asks for Jasmine’s help to make peace with Terra and the other girls. Jasmine says she can only help so much. True dat.

All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

Joe returns home with no troubles in Tijuana and the C-Section is scheduled for the following morning. Terra does not want an epidural, she wants a one-touch spinal. She instructs Joe to open a can of whoop-ass with the doctors if they don’t follow her birthing plan. Joe tries to explain to Terra that not everything goes according to plan. It seems to me as if Joe already knows something will go wrong.

Today is the day! I’m so excited to learn whether it’s a Sheila or a Louie. Or a little or an average. Joe wants a girl and Terra wants a boy. It’s about to get real because the drugs aren’t working. Terra can feel pain and she’s having difficulty breathing. Joe is doing his best to calm Terra. The baby’s head is out, the shoulder is out, and then the entire baby is out! It’s a boy! A big boy!

All About the Tea_Little Women LA S5

Terra is instructed over and over by the nurses to breathe in through her nose and blow it out. The baby can be heard crying in the background. Terra is feeling a lot of pain in her stomach and it might have something to do with the fact that her uterus is still on the table, says the doctor. Joe cuts the chord, ditching Terra and her pain. The baby weighs in at 7 lbs.10 oz. and doesn’t need to go to the NICU. Hooray!

Tune in next week when drama ensues over the baby name Louie!

 

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