Welcome back!!! I love this show… It proves that ratchet comes in all sizes and this show is no exception. For those who are not quite familiar with the group you have: The Twerkin Twins Andrea and Amanda; the Wannabe Twins Left Cheek Bri and Right Cheek Emily; Minnie the Moocher Liar, Monie the BFF of Minnie and Ms. Juicy, the Grinch with red hair..the villain.
First we see the Twerkin Twins (Amanda and Andrea) riding around in a very big car. Andrea just received her driver’s license, and she and her sister, Amanda (who is now 26 weeks pregnant by her non-having-job baby daddy Chris) are on their way to meet friends for some water aerobics cause a girl’s gotta keep her cheeks tight for all that twerkin yall. Ms. Juicy and Monie are at the pool. Everyone is all excited to catch up. Juicy begins the gossip about Minnie being pregnant with Pastor Troy’s baby. He is not a real pastor, he just raps like one on TV. The ladies do not know what to really believe because every time Minnie’s lips are moving, she is lying. Ms. Juicy says she wants to throw Minnie a surprise baby shower out of the goodness of her heart. Right. Monie is suspicious of Ms. Juicy’s motives because they hate each other. She goes along with the plan however because Minnie is her best friend…allegedly. In the meantime, they engage in underwater twerkin aerobics. #It’sAllAboutThatBass
Next we are with Emily who returned to Texas to give birth to her baby boy because there may be complications and Texas has the best specialist for her condition. She isn’t sure if the baby will be born a little person or average, like her daughter (who is a cutie btw). Lontel, her baby daddy, is also there with her and he is not happy. He is glad she didn’t gain a lot of weight. She tells him she is nervous about the C-Section which is in 3 days. He just wants to go to work. He tells shawty err’thang gon be alright so chill on all that little person talk.
Minnie is at her mom’s house. Her mom is mad that TMZ and the internet was all a buzz about her daughter’s pregnancy and she didn’t have the decency to tell her own momma first. Minnie is all sad looking because she has a confession: she’s not pregnant (shocker)…BUT she thinks she had a miscarriage. Say what now? Her mom has a look on her face like “my poor lying child..not this again. After shedding some crocodile tears, Minnie is worried about telling the “group” about her lie, miscarriage. Her mother says she should tell the truth and if they are her true friend they will understand that she is just a crazy liar. Minnie also has to tell Pastor Troy who believes he knocked her up. I think he will react like guys on Maury Povich when he announces you are NOT the father. #NoWorriesBoo
Monie, or shall we say New Monie because she is all smiles and giggles without the Mohawk but a new long weave is now living with her boyfriend, Morlin, practicing her voice overs for him. She has a unique voice and wants to make money doing voice over work. Morlin says she needs to have more feeling while reading her script. Monie says she needs to learn how to “pronounciate.” Yep. Morlin drops hints about marrying her but Monie says, until she sees a ring, she isn’t holding her breath. They discuss the surprise baby shower. Morlin is also suspicious of Ms. Juicy’s motives. Monie tells him that she spoke to Minnie personally and Minnie told her she is really pregnant. Monie just hopes Ms. Juicy is being sincere about the baby shower and that Minnie isn’t lying or both will see the return of Old Monie and the ass whupping shall commence. Morlin says he prefers this New Monie, with the long blue and black weave. She is such a lady. Awww.
Back at Andrea’s house, she and her out of work baby daddy, Chris, are having a discussion about how he doesn’t bring in cash to their household. Chris is sitting there in his socks, with his feet on the little coffee table, along with a red cup. He tells his pregnant girlfriend, Amanda, “you think you betta than me cuz you be twerking and making all that money yo! Nobody wants to hear all that chit so shut da phuck up!” I cannot tell if she is grinning (from shock) at his total disrespect or if she just looks that way due to her cute overbite. Either way, she high tails it right across the hall and busts into her twin’s apartment (door unlocked). They don’t live together, but they live next door to each other. #Inseparable. Andrea, while making grilled cheese for her boo, tells Amanda that Chris needs to get it together. Her boo agrees…Hey does he have a job now? Where do they find these men?
Bri (Left Cheek) flies into Texas to give moral support for her girl, Emily (Right Cheek), because she is going to have this baby soon. They discuss Lontel’s lack of interest and Emily wonders if he is going to be a good father to their unborn son. I think you should have thought of that BEFORE you opened your knees and threw out the condom…IJS. Emily is about to get the results of her sonogram to see if her baby will be a little person, or average size like her first baby. Either way she just wants a healthy baby. Lontel is at work or he would have been at the appointment. At least this is what she tells Emily. The results are in: the baby will be a little person. Emily is nervous to tell Lontel. Hmmm, I wonder why.
Next, Monie and Ms. Juicy are at a Party City-like store shopping for baby shower decorations. They don’t know if Minnie is having a girl or a boy. Monie is perplexed because, as her BFF, she should know something. She still has her doubts if Minnie is actually pregnant. Ms. Juicy just shows her Grinch smile and cannot wait to throw the party to see the look on Minnie’s face. I’ll Bet. #JustShady
Emily meets up with Lontel and tells him about her sonogram news. He is more afraid of what people will think now that he knows the baby is going to be a little person. He is also upset that he won’t be able to play sports like regular people with his son. Wow. Emily thinks Lontel is just scared. No he’s just a jerk who knocked you up. Honestly, I STILL don’t know why she decided to procreate with him. He treated her like pure doggy doo doo last season. Oh well. They decide to check into a hotel close to the hospital because the C-Section is scheduled very early the next morning. Emily is fearful. Lontel says he is not ready for a kid (a little late for that buddy) and then he leaves because he has to go to work. At least he has a job. Bri stop by to offer support, comfort and a gift for her BFF. She asks Emily if she thinks Lontel is seeing someone else. Emily doesn’t know because they have been off and he has been on her getting her preggers, but she is more concerned about the birth of her newest baby at this point.
Minnie decides to visit Pastor Troy at his studio. He is rapping about being a legend. I still do not have a clue who the hell he is or what record has he made. Anyway, he comes out of the booth, doesn’t hug Minnie but asks “whatcha doing outchea?” She says nothing, just stopping to see ya. He asks about her morning sickness. His engineer/sound guy rolls his eyes like “this is some bullchit. You know this girl ain’t pregnant.” Minnie decides not to break it to Pastor Troy that she really isn’t pregnant. He goes back into the studio to lay down some more tracks.
During the C-Section, Emily has a few complications and the baby has to be intubated. He isn’t crying. We will come back to this in a moment.
Lying Minnie meets the Twerkin Twins for lunch. She says she hopes they do not ask her about her fake baby, but as soon as they sit down she asks Amanda how is HER pregnancy going. What a way to avoid a topic Minnie. Amanda bunts it back to Minnie and asks about her pregnancy. Minnie says her pregnancy is going fine, but she hasn’t felt the baby kicked yet. Seriously. By this time Minnie’s nose should be 8 feet long. The twins think it is weird that Minnie hardly ever talks about her pregnancy while Amanda cannot shut up about her own. Yeah, it is weird, BECAUSE SHE’S NOT PREGNANT. Minnie receives a phone call from Bri saying Emily has had the baby. Yay!
Meanwhile, back at the hospital, Emily’s little boy is indeed born, but he had trouble breathing. She still hasn’t seen him but Bri was there and took a picture with her phone and shows the new mommy. Sweet. Emily is proud of how Lontell didn’t bitch up but actually watched the entire C-Section. #GoldStarForBabyDaddy.
And now the moment of truth: The baby shower. Monie and Ms Juicy arrive first with their male friends. I guess this baby shower is co-ed. No one really knows if Minnie truly has a bun in the oven, but they got Moscato and start popping bottles and drinking…at a baby shower. Amanda and Andrea arrive and Amanda is mad she cannot drink. Monie asked how did Ms. Juicy get Minnie to come out and Ms. Juicy says she told her that she was inviting her to a girl’s night out party (in the daytime). Minnie arrives and SURPRISE!!! She is all like “what yall doing?” Monie says it’s her surprise baby shower and Ms. Juicy just rubs her paws like the Devil Meeting his next victim at the door of Hades..Come on in Minnie!
The ladies start asking Minnie what has she bought for the baby and does she know if she is having a boy or a girl. Minnie says she isn’t telling them anything…at first…then she starts blabbing about her periods and that’s when the men are excused. Thank Gawd. Minnie finally, well sort of, confesses that she was never pregnant, but that she had a miscarriage. Huh? Monie asks for clarification, such as if she had a miscarriage, did she get a D & C? She also asks did she take a pregnancy test and was it confirmed by the doctor. Minnie is busted. Monie says if they are going to be friends Minnie may need professional help about all this lying she does. Minnie cannot take the interrogation and starts to shout at Monie “you questioning me like I’m a bitch on the streets!” Shots Fired. To be continued.
This season on Little Women Atlanta it seems like there will be a lot more twerkin, working and a new girl is joining the crew. Minnie’s mother gets into a fight with Ms. Juicy and Monie may get her ring after all. This is going to be good.