Before we begin The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion Part 1, at the beautiful Georgia Ballroom, the ladies begin with a prayer. “Lord, please don’t let Porsha hit anyone. Amen.” Not really, but let’s get started with the show anyway.
Right off the bat Andy asks Kenya if she’s pregnant. Kenya says she can’t tell Andy. Can’t or won’t? Kenya likes to keep some mystery, girl, so no telling. The Shady Bunch montage is shown and Andy asks, mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the shadiest of them all. As you may have guessed, southern belle,
Shaedra Phaedra Parks appears in the mirror. Kim needs another year of shade-school to graduate.
They discuss some of the digs, and Kenya mentions shots about their looks, like Phaedra calling her Oatmeal face, hurts the most. Phaedra says she wasn’t talking about Kenya’s looks, she was talking about her skin. Kenya will just cry all the way to the bank over that one, honey. Her hair care line is set to hit CVS in six months. So look out. Even Porsha gave it a good review. Her friend used it on her dog and the dog loved it. Aces!
Speaking of Aces, clips are shown of Kandi and Todd preparing for the baby’s arrival, including Todd leaving the tense ultrasound to take a call. Todd joins Kandi on the couch to discuss how their life has changed with Andy. Kenya says that if her man had done that, she’d be upset. Nobody cares. Did you know Baby Ace has an Instagram account with over 100K followers – and he hasn’t even shown his face? Lastly, Kandi admits Cynthia was right about running a restaurant. Sucks the life right out of her breasts, which Todd thinks taste really sweet. Ewww.
She by Sheree joins the group. This season has been a great experience for her and everyone wants to check her boo. Andy asks about her first impression of Kenya and Sheree says, intense. How weird. That’s what everyone says.
Next, clips are shown of Tootie struggling to fit in, especially in Miami. Afterwards, Andy asked each of the ladies if Kim fit in on the show, starting with Kim – She’s not sure but thought it was entertaining. Kenya says no, Kim is too condescending. Kandi doesn’t know because Kim doesn’t do confrontation and the show is all about confrontation. Phaedra thinks Kim doesn’t engage enough. And Cynthia says Kim is uncomfortable. So there you go, no one thinks Kim is a fit. Good luck on Dancing With the Stars.
Nothing was settled over the Washington DC trip and bringing kids on a trip that’s about children, but not for children. What’s Kim going to do in Los Angeles? I’m sure the kids, Chris, and the nanny are moving with her.
The next montage was of the demise of Phaedra and Kandi’s friendship. The two were more upset in the clips than at the reunion watching the clips. Phaedra doesn’t know what Kandi wants. She sent the essentials when Baby Ace was born, potato salad and flowers, what more does Kandi want? Kandi’s voice gets shaky when she warns Phaedra not to come for her man and he is not on an allowance and he is not in jail. #winner
Phaedra tells Andy there’s a difference between being fake and being raised well. And there’s also a difference between being raised honest and being raised delusional. Cynthia and Kandi tell Andy they each assumed Phaedra knew the motorcycles and cars were in their garages. You know what happens when you assume something. But good news for Todd, in order for Phaedra to claim she paid Todd in full in time for the reunion, she wrote him the final payment for the exercise video last week. Will we ever see it? Probably not. Phaedra is currently “paying” for someone to re-edit the video.
Some quick mentions are: 1) Does Kandi think the Kandi-coated-click overstepped their boundaries. No. 2) Should pregnant women up their insurance on this show? Maybe. 3) Should Kenya text her boyfriend during the show about feeding the puppies? Hell no. Andy says, “You put the food in the bowl.” And Matt and Kenya want to have a baby?
Clips are shown of Kenya and Kim and the infamous eyewear commercial. Kim Fields is at the grown-up table and Kenya is at the kiddie table. Loved it. When Andy asked Kim about Kenya’s pilot, Kim was actually complimentary of her comedic skills and thought the pilot had potential, but after the Jamaica fiasco, doesn’t want to work with Kenya. As far as careers go, Kenya feels that hers is superior and Kim is the low man on the totem pole. Kim said she was going to let social media handle her response. Let’s call Spike Lee and ask him who he’d rather…
Speaking of Spike Lee, when Cynthia is asked if she thinks Kenya would have missed that meeting if it were with Spike, Kenya interrupts and says, she wouldn’t have cared what beam went where in her house.
Moving on, Andy tries his best to explain to Kenya that by yanking Kim’s chair back, she is guilty of invading someone’s personal space, and is no different than Porsha. Kenya doesn’t like this and says it’s not the same thing, but admits she was out of line and apologized. Porsha says she apologized, too, but certain people won’t accept her apology. Cynthia says that someday somebody’s going to get seriously hurt. Bravo is probably banking on it and has taken the advice on extra insurance. Kenya tells Porsha to “drive by” with her theory that if Kenya had pulled out any of the other ladies’ chairs it would have been game on and weaves would have been flying.
Next up is the game: Andy Points Out. Is Kenya jealous of Kim? Kenya says she’s not going to discount Kim as a child actor. Andy points out that Kim’s career continued beyond childhood. Kenya says, Into the 90’s. Andy points out that Kenya won Miss USA in the 90’s. Kenya says that Kim speaks of herself in the third person and thinks highly of herself. Andy points out that Kenya considers herself “Gone With the Wind fabulous.” Thanks for playing, Kenya, your parting gift is a “Mazel” door-knocker should Moore Manor ever be completed.
Kandi rather enjoyed Kim’s cocky moments in her testimonials and hopes this means Kim can someday fit in because it was agreed a long time ago that Kandi is the boring one. Kim is stealing her non-spotlight.
Simultaneously Kim and Kenya clap while they speak over each other. Something about, Don’t interrupt me, I’m not a child, You are a child, We are bored by you, child. Kim explains that Kenya’s interrupting of others is a form of bullying. Don’t get Kenya started on bullying – she’s been accused of it many times by better people than Kim.
Tune in next week for the real drama. Tonight was softball. Next time it gets real.
I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run.