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Plural Marriage Flop! 5 Reasons to Cancel TLC’s ‘Sister Wives’

Sister Wives Polygamy

TLC is keeping their Sister Wives viewers hanging, as there has yet to be an announcement revealing the spring premiere date of the hit show’s seventh season.

Enormous emotional chasms were exposed last season, darkening a lifestyle painted rosy by the Browns, and craftily edited, by TLC. Plural marriage has been televised as an epic failure, and it’s time for TLC to switch gears, and cancel this hot mess of a show. Wishful thinking I know, but here’s why.

1. FAKE Relationships: The only love relationship swirling around the Brown cul-de-sac is the one between Kody and his fourth and least chunky wife, Robyn. Kody prances between the mini-mansions, trying to sell his undying passion for  the other three, but fails, season after season. Meri, Janelle, and Christine snark, sob, and scarf their feelings to cope with the ongoing rejection. Children are ignored, even to the point of neglect. Favoritism runs rampant, and the wives are often seen competing for a coveted chance to run their fingers through Kody’s scraggly hair. Jealousy eats the women alive.

2. BRAZEN Coverups: TLC routinely smooths and and edits the shady moves that the Browns pull behind their backs. The network also spins their own contrived nonsense, expecting the fans to bite. An anthropology study was discovered fake, a manipulated wife-swapping divorce was somehow made virtuous, and when Meri swan-dived into the water with an online catfish — TLC had no idea. Call in the late-night editors, to pretty up the plural mess — hardly reality TV, nor an honest portrayal of an irresponsible and destructive lifestyle. SHAME on you, TLC.

3. REJECTED Leading Lady: Fans have an overwhelming sour taste for Robyn Brown, and the glaring favoritism that King Kodes lavishes on her and her children. Social media feedback weakly cheers the other wives, but most viewers have NO interest in the Robyn and Kody show — TLC’s predicted direction. Robyn Brown is strongly disliked, and nobody wants to watch the zany adventures of Kody, Robyn, Prince Solomon, and Princess Eri-May.

4. DECEPTIVE Disclosures: The divorce/marriage whammy involving Kody, Meri and Robyn — the eerily successful adoption of Robyn’s children — and the catfish scandal that almost busted a desperate wife out of the compound all dodged, ducked, or dishonestly excused. Numerous other disturbing incidents, including a horrifying case of child neglect, were explained away with a quasi-sincere furrow of Kody’s brow. The family addresses little to nothing, with next to no fan interaction, on social media. Meri Brown has even edged into social irresponsibility, evidenced by her recent allegiance with a crew cockroach-like online vigilantes, determined to bully their way to some perceived justice. 

5. FAILED Mission: Kody Brown and his wives have said that their mission with the show is to make the public more aware of polygamist families and to combat societal prejudices. The dysfunctional mess that the Browns have exposed, pronounces polygamy a failure. Three out of four of the wives are perpetually miserable, lonely, needy, (orange), and overweight. Any public “awareness” that the Browns have brought to their cause has backfired, after six seasons of televised misery. Their spotlighted efforts to legalize polygamy is their true agenda, camouflaged by tater tot dinners, and dramatically hyped family parties. Their audience is simply not as gullible as the hundreds of brainwashed women, sadly trapped in polygamist cults. 

The jig is up, TLC. Stick five forks in it, and send the Browns back to the welfare line — with the rest of the polygamists. 

 

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