Well, we had our first outing with the ladies on The Real Housewives of Potomac last week. And it looks like Gizelle Bryant has been appointed the piñata this season, taking her hits first from birthday girl, Karen Huger, and later Charrisse Jackson Jordan.
Karen got her panties in a wad when Gizelle sat in the center of the horseshoe booth during Karen’s birthday dinner.
“I had no idea that Karen was upset over her seating arrangements… I have seen her take down and demolish the best and the worst of characters. So why have a seating assignment issue with me and stay silent? If it were me and I was the birthday girl, I would have just said, “Girl, get out my seat”…”
Point to Gizelle. So many of these Housewife confrontations could be cleared up with a simple request. But of course, that is not the Housewife way. Instead, Karen decides to get all passive aggressive and give Gizelle the rules of birthday etiquette in a mirrored frame.
“Everyone can see that I was not raised under a rock or a bridge. I’ve read a couple of posts from Mrs. Emily Post and my mother has raised a lady. HOWEVER, Karen’s/Potomac’s rules of etiquette change with the wind and the champagne. If the breeze is blowing and the bubbly is flowing God only knows the rules of Karen.”
Another point to Gizelle. That little gift was simply unnecessary.
“My rule number one of etiquette is to be on time. Gizelle is always punctual… The rest of these ladies might need to readjust their CP clock. Don’t waste my time and I won’t ever waste yours. Everyone is given a fifteen minute window for lateness. After that, I will proceed to do what I do best…eat, drink, and be beautiful.”
Ooo. Sorry, Gizelle. Point deducted for speaking about yourself in the third person.
Next, Charrisse asked Gizelle to help her with the crab boil. Easy peasy. Gizelle shows up with her buddy, Kal, in tow to help out and proceeds to do all the cooking. But Charrisse was put out with Gizelle’s unexpected guest.
“I brought Kal with me to help with the crabs because a) He knows how to cook crabs better than me. b) He was my guest – since when don’t I get a plus one? c) He makes me laugh and sometimes Charrisse’s parties need people who can break the dullness.”
Then Charrisse got a little salty as Gizelle and Kal came up the stairs to talk to her. Don’t bother Miss Charrisse while she’s getting her makeup done! She will boot your ass all the way down the hill to the curb.
“When we are walking down the hall asking Charrisse if she wanted Kal to do her hair I had no clue that I was going to be hit with her sideways, stank response. I just broke a sweat in her kitchen cooking for her guests. I was feeling confusion as to really what her issue could be…”
All righty, I’m tired of keeping track of points—which is why I quit Weight Watchers, and we’re only three weeks into the new year. I’m on Team Gizelle for now, but I retain the right to reverse my decision later in the season. It was completely hypocritical of Karen and Charrissee to call out Gizelle for her lack of etiquette while threatening to kick her out and calling her ignorant to her face.
So what do you think of our new ladies? Who’s on your favorites list?
I’m a fiction writer by day and a reality TV addict by night.