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RECAP: Married to Medicine – The Group Arrives in the Bahamas and Mariah Breaks Down [Episode 13]

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On this week’s episode of Married to Medicine we are going to the Bahamas—eventually. First, we have to rehash Jill’s prohibition party that prohibited class, elegance, and charitable trust. Over at Toya’s house, she and Lisa Nicole are discussing how much fun they had, but what was up with Quad and Mariah, coming in and hanging on Dr. Gregory like they was ornaments on a Christmas tree? Who do they think they are?

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Over at Mariah’s house, Dr. Simone stops by with two bottles of wine because they’ll need them. Simone feels bad for the way she voted Mariah off the island, and to make up for it, she’s inviting her to another island. Mariah cannot believe how nice everyone was to her face at the prohibition party. Simone mentions Mariah’s amazing arrival with Quad. Mariah explains she has forgiven Quad, but not forgotten what she did. Simone provides a subliminal message: Like a man who cheats (Darren) it takes time to trust again (Lisa).

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Back over at Toya’s, Jill has joined Toya and Lisa and they want to know what went down with Dr. John and Dr. Daddy. Jill says, “Without even a hello, Damon said John disrespected his wife.” Okay, Jill. So let me get this straight. If Damon had just said hello first, there wouldn’t be a problem? It boils down to etiquette? Girl, please…disappear.

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There is a short scene with Quad and Dr. G packing for the Bahamas. He is full of optimism about the trip and the couples’ capacity for enduring friendships. I’m pretty sure he’s on something. Dr. Jackie has a touching scene with Keisha about taking care of her father with Alzheimer’s, and making him comfortable, no matter what.

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The gang meets up at the airport and off we go with the Bahama-Mama’s. Toya is excited to have sex without interruption, until she see’s her hotel room, complete with a stray cat. Mariah is here with a clean slate, until dinner that is, then her slate gets sandy. Heavenly is scared to be here with Mariah and without her Daddy, but Damon had to work – and according to Heavenly – ain’t nothing wrong with a black man having a job. And Lisa wants to be impregnated with twins this week by Dr. Darren. Oh joy, more of them running around.

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It’s time for the highly anticipated dinner-of-drama that Bravo is known for. Steel drums, tiki torches, tables on the beach, the basic recipe for a vacation dinner disaster. Mariah sets the tone when she announces she ain’t waiting all night for these late bitches to eat.

Spotting potential danger, the men step away and warn Jill’s husband, Dr. John, that when the wives start fighting, it is their cue to walk away. Dr. Eugene mentions the troubled past between his wife, Toya, and Dr Aydin’s wife, Mariah, and basically how there’s a trickle down effect when it comes to female drama. Dr. Aydin apparently didn’t get the memo that the men are better at letting things go because he is still holding on tight to his wife’s beef with the ladies. Eugene is surprised to hear this. He tells Aydin to speak to him, not through their wives, if there’s a problem. And when Eugene asks to speak to him privately, Aydin says it’s all good in the hood, but obvious it’s not.

Over on the ladies’ side of the sand, Heavenly apologizes for misjudging Mariah and voting against her – even though she still thinks she’s a low-down, dirty bitch. Lisa says she didn’t care for being called boring by Mariah, but since Lisa is straight-up fabulous, she’s willing to forget it. Toya asks how Mariah and Quad, of all people, are friends again. It’s because Quad sent a well-wishing text to Mariah while she was in the hospital for the second time, and Toya didn’t send a text until one month later. Mariah tells the ladies their flower-sending skills suck.

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Heavenly wants Dr. Gregory to have a sit down with each of the women and diagnose them – but does it on her own because that’s just who Heavenly is. Dr. Jackie has OCD; Jill is stupid; Mariah is crazy; Quad is emotional; Simone has deep-rooted childhood issues; and Toya doesn’t give a shit. Heavenly doesn’t diagnose herself, so why don’t we. Heavenly is a narcissist. Or is she judgmental? Or is she delusional? Help, Dr. Gregory!

Finally they sit down and Simone begins with a toast telling the group what a blessing it is to have everyone there. Quad speaks only to Mariah and tells her she’s glad she’s back. Dr. Eugene says that everyone at the table is family – if by family you mean dysfunctional people that you didn’t choose to be in your life – then yes. Sing it, Eugene, “We are family, I got all my sisters with me.”

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Mariah interrupts with tears to let everyone know, they are in fact, not family. Her family sends flowers. Dr. Jackie goes over and reminds Mariah not to be angry. Mariah says she wishes they would have stayed home. Mariah and Aydin get up and leave before dinner is served. No conch soup for you – one year.

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Next to be served-up on the platter is Lisa and Darren. The chef doing the skewering is Toya. She calls Darren out on his shadiness to Miss Lisa. Toya says she hopes going forward that Darren will be more open. Open? No, girl. How about more honest? Or more committed. Sounds like Darren already is open, no need for more. Darren explains that if he’d known his wife was going to a strip club, he would have told her which one to avoid all about the bonding trip with his brothers.

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Jill stupidly explains that her husband either must tell her he’s going to the strip club or bring her with him, and the real reason that stripper said something to Lisa was because of her funeral hat and holy water she was spewing. Jill then accuses Lisa of making her money in a pyramid scheme. Jill’s husband, Dr. John, looks so bored, it’s as if he’s contemplating divorce or something – if only a reason would fall into his lap. Lisa defends her direct pyramid sales scheme by explaining when people make money, they can go to Harvard. 

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Dinner is pretty much ruined, and as they leave to go back to their rooms, the arguing continues between Lisa and Jill. Lisa explains that Jill was also handing out business cards that night trying to recruit people for her husband’s office. Jill says she wasn’t preaching to change their lives, just to lift, nip and tuck them. Lisa calls Jill an airhead. Jill says she may be a blonde Barbie, but she has more education—two ivory league degrees—so nanny-nanny-boo-boo. Stick that in your sewing machine.

 

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