It’s a special night on Teen Mom, because the four moms will actually be in the same city, a rare treat. We begin with the young parents still in their hometowns.
Catelynn and Tyler are packing in preparation for the press junket, promoting the show in New York. They will be meeting up with the other stars, and Catelynn is excited to see everyone, even that porn princess, Farrah. The couple spats about Catleynn not having cute city clothes that fit, and Catelynn appears sick of the subject of her fluctuating scale. They arrive in the city, horrified at all of the baby luggage.
Farrah has arrived in the city early, for some boyfriend canoodling time. She and Simon kissy face in the car, which is quite a spectacle with Farrah’s new pillow lips. They chitchat with the driver, and Simon reveals that he believes most wives are big nags, which triggers Farrah’s lips to immediately shut down. We jump to the couple snuggling in a booth, where Farrah challenges Simon about his apparent hatred for the mere mention of marriage. Simon evades clarification, and Farrah is pleased, and thinks that he’s the most awesome guy she has ever clung desperately to.
Over at Amber’s, she and Matt are in their normal assumed couch position, when Gary and Leah call to check in. Producer bestie Heather reminds her of the upcoming teen wreck reunion, and Amber thinks the whole ordeal will be super stressful. Matt reminds her that a free trip is a free trip. Later we witness little Leah balking at going back to her reclining dad, but Amber pep talks her back home.
We check in the Maci, Taylor and their new dog Bonnie. The couple discusses the difficulties of combining pregnancy with life, and their ongoing unengaged state. Maci can’t wait to see the girls, except Farrah, who may know that Bentley was yanked from production, because of her extremely icky presence. Maci hopes that the foursome survives seeing each other. She arrives in New York, and is worried about seeing Farrah.
The four moms greet each other, and exchange pleasantries, while they get their hair and makeup done, and google over Nova. They congratulate Amber on her engagement, and take publicity pictures. The group gets a looksie at the official show trailer, and drama is in the air, as the righteously indignant footage of Maci telling production that no back door floozy will grace the credits with THIS freshly pregnant teen mom.
The girls film interviews for the MTV website, and meet back at the hotel for dinner. Maci reiterates that she is concerned about Bentley hearing that his mother is associating with a back door porn queen, and Amber feels that her addiction issues were so bad that her loser meter is all messed up. They discuss how the phrase “Teen Mom” was used in Farrah’s dirty flick, and how Google tends to give it top billing. Tyler comments that his dignity would only be sold for top dollar.
Back at MTV studios, Farrah is shown the Maci footage, while the production team breathlessly drools for her reaction. Farrah thinks that “that much of emotion” definitely calls for counseling, but due to her disassociation from mankind, she doesn’t really care. Production baits her, but she blames MTV for judging her, and nails them for manipulating her into a contrived emotional response. Wait…GO Farrah?
Maci meets up with some New York pals to eat pizza, and talk about the new baby. She fills them in on Farrahgate, and her decision to just shut up and hope for the best when she sees her naughty co-star. We jump to Farrah’s room where Heather gently asks her her to spill her true feelings about Maci. Farrah blinds herself with hairspray, while commenting that Maci is in a box of ignorance.
It’s not about porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, and her aspiring ex Ryan, is most likely a fan anyway. Heather is jumping from room to room, gathering deep thoughts, and it’s Amber’s turn to weigh in on the drama. She expresses in a poignant speech, that she doesn’t care.
Magazine interviews are next, and we watch the two duos flub lines, and share their sharpest MTV thoughts. Farrah responds in a snarky fake manner, playing MTV like a violin. During a lunch break, the showdown occurs, and Farrah instigates the festivities by questioning Maci’s motives for doing the show. Farrah blows, and Maci keeps her cool, claiming different parenting styles as the root of the conflict.
Heather pulls the two aside to hash it out, cameras blazing. Farrah disagrees with how Maci “rationales things in her brain,” and Maci has her fill of the aggressiveness and leaves, telling the other cast members that Farrah resembles a herd of chihuahuas when she is angry. The cast minus Farrah, is eating pizza for the tenth time in two days, while chatting about Farrah being kinda sorta mean. Matt looks around, just loving the hip, post-adolescent, rap session.
The after-show special is being filmed, and Maci shares that her no-Farrah clause extends to this taping. Production is disappointed at the lost chance at fireworks, but sits all four of them down, hoping for the best snark possible. Amber tries to articulate to Farrah that a Twitter diss stings, and Farrah responds by staring at her like a blank-faced mannequin. Catelynn tries to play peacemaker, and they all agree to just try to get along, now that they are headed home. We wrap the episode by watching the moms travel home to resume the drama back on their home turf. See you next week for all of the fun!
Becca is a Senior Editor for All About The Tea. She’s a coastal girl who loves the outdoors, and writing about the sneaky and silly side of reality TV. Her bio is short, but her snark is endless. She loves writing for the sharpest posters in the world.