#BloodSweatHeels Recap: “For Love or Family” [Episode 6]

Posted on May 4 2015 - 2:00am by Norrth Cafe

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I always giggle at the hardcore theme song for this show. Some stooge decided a theme song better suited to Love and Hip Hop fit this group. Wrong. Well… then again, we open to Mica talking to Daisy about meeting  with Demetria for lunch. Daisy hopes Demetria will be kind, considering how soft Mica really is and hopes Demetria will be less judgmental and rude than she has been in the past by calling Mica an alcoholic. Expecting Demetria to be anything other than judgmental is the equivalent of expecting ice water in hell. Ain’t gonna happen. Mica takes an (inside)  parting shot by reminding herself to grab enough money ($50) for a cab. #LessonsLearnedFromGeneva. Across town, the Bobbsey Twins, Arzo and Melyssa, are meeting up at Arzo’s showroom. 

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We learn that Arzo considers Melyssa her family in NYC since she is so far away from her own family in California. It’s clear the Yesterday is not just the name of her significant other, but a soon-to-be description of her relationship if she can’t figure out how to tell her family about the guy. Melyssa says he is the best thing to happen to her since he’s the first guy to make her laugh instead of cry. Melyssa thinks Arzo is selling her family short.

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We see Chantelle visiting Daisy, whose room is uncharacteristically messy – letting us know just how tired poor Daisy must be. Since finding out about her condition, Melyssa, Mica, Chantelle and Arzo have all visited Daisy. Crickets on Geneva and Demetria. Daisy wishes they could have all talked about their talents and projects instead of fighting at lunch the other day. Chantelle realizes how small it was in light of real problems, like Daisy’s battle for her health. Is Andy Cohen producing this show? A line like that would have gotten Daisy fired on a RHofWhatever show.

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Clearly not Cohenized, Mica and Demetria’s talk over their differences. Demetria wants Mica to know that she is not mean and doesn’t want everyone to be like her she wants everyone to be themselves.  In a talking head interview (TH) she wants us to know she edited romance novels for five years and she is not NOT a soft person (what’s wrong with Bravo’s NYC women this season? They are murdering spoken language.) By the end, each thinks the other is a changed woman. They laugh and talk to one another about their lives and loves and end up enjoying. their visit together.  Impressive. I actually feel less guilty for watching #RHOA after watching this scene.

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Geneva is holding on her own luncheon, meeting with a photographer, journalist, and her new personal assistant to help her launch “Geneva Style Daily,” a news site which she describes as a HuffingtonPost for black women. She doesn’t feel equipped to help “Becky” with her needs. Can’t you see her lawyers cringing, right now? She views her idol, Ariamna Huffington as an Anna Wintour with a brain. Whoops!

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As Chantelle visits Geneva at home, later, it is revealed that she is funding the project out of her pocket. She knows that she’ll have to work hard or go home to Detroit. Is it possible both will happen? Wishes wishes.  

Across town, now that her book is done (and why is she so closed-lip about that book???) Demetria is looking at sketches of her wedding suit (peplum, pencil skirt, etc). In rapid succession, Yesterday is disappointed that Arzo has met his family, he is not meeting hers.  

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Geneva has changed the name of the site to “JawBreaker,” telling Chantelle it’s like her – hard candy with lots of layers. AND damn it all, because I suffered, you will too, we learn that one year, Geneva’s family gave her granny a vibrator. This proves, I guess, how hip and open they are. I will spare you the rest. Suffice it to say Geneva wants to help you have better sex by advising you on how to make that happen. No thanks?

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Arzo and Melyssa are picked up by Arzo’s childhood friend, Thuy. She thinks her Cambodian background is very similar to Arzo’s Afghani background (no dating, no guy friends). All three joke about Arzo possibly one day bringing home “Black Afghan” babies. I am guessing Yesterday didn’t get the giggles watching that scene.

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Ah! Now Mica makes sense. Mica is apparently the apple of her grandmother’s eye and visits her after learning her health is failing. We learn that as a young woman, even when she partied in NYC, her grandmother tagged along, to make sure she was safe wherever she went. She jokes about being on the dance floor and seeing her grandmother asleep, wig hanging to the side, waiting for the night to end. Having grown up in a deeply racist south, Mica’s grandmother won a basketball scholarship to Shaw University but wasn’t permitted to go because of her family’s fear. She feels that her grandmother, lovingly, lives through her and wants to see her fulfill her dreams. She pushed her to embrace life. Mica jokes about taking her grandmother clubbing, later, and a dance party breaks out. Mica’s grandmother puts everyone to shame with her dance moves.

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Melyssa finally meets Arzo’s family and learns that her parents can’t understand why she is in NYC and not home with them. Arzo’s father, Zia, wants to know why young people don’t go home and visit their parents, more. Melyssa loves having Zia around, missing her own dad, and listens to their discussion about becoming refugees. According to Zia,  Arzo is the smartest of his children.  She says that  if you are not a doctor, judge, or lawyer, her father thinks you have, in essence, wasted your talents. He admits it.

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Her parents don’t get what she does, or who she is and think she has chosen her new life over them. I am even sorrier for them knowing they have no idea that she has chosen a man they are totally clueless about. Melyssa thinks she is selling her parents show, but Arzo believes it will matter that he is not Muslim, especially since her family prides itself on being direct descendants of the Prophet Muhammed. I hope they will be open to her boyfriend, since he seems to truly love her.

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Demetria checks out the venue for the wedding. She is clueless about what the wedding planner has been up to because she was finishing the  book she so rarely mentions. She realizes that she is catching wedding fever and is getting excited. Geneva and Melyssa are the only two women she’s invited. Talk about a toxic combination.

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By the way, I am DONE with the Food Channel. I get my foodie fix from  Bravo, these days. The RHOA, Shahs of Sunset, Kathy Wakile (RHONJ) and now this show. Arzo’s family makes a meal that makes me want to crawl through the television and join them. She describes her family like either black folks or Italians… loud and loves to eat. Isn’t that true of MOST families? There is talk of whether Arzo would be married if she stayed home. She does not take the opportunity to tell them about her beloved. Shortly after talking about how wonderful her mother is, mom is crying, missing her daughter and thinking she loves the city more than she loves them. Tears and tasty food. Bravo does love the drama. I believe her tears are real, I just wish I didn’t have to see them and feel so bad for her worried mother. I  still think Arzo is doing the right thing, seeking her own happiness.

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Mica is taking her grams to a restaurant and is saddened that for the first time ever, she had to put her in a wheelchair. Mica updates her family on what is going on with the other women. “Granny” goes to sleep and they talk about her health issues, including the fact that with congestive heart failure she has six months to a year. Mica reflects on her father’s death, Daisy’s illness and now the prospect of losing her grandmother. She vows to come back soon to spend time with her grandmother, who knows the secrets she has never shared with anyone else. They are clearly the loves of one another’s lives, such a beautifully nurturing relationship between the two.

We end with Mica and her grandmother sitting together looking at a pond. It’s sweet and sad.  I hope she will get to visit her grandmother again soon. The episode was all about love and family. Well done, Bravo. Well done.


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About the Author

I’m an exasperated soap fan who keeps hanging on – waiting for the daytime I once loved to return to its former glory! Hey, it doesn’t hurt to have a dream. I learned to love soaps thanks to my wonderful mother and grandmother. I’ll always have fond memories of daytime, most especially of ‘Another World’, my first stoap love. The ever great, but sadly defunct, daytime shows like Ryan’s Hope, Search for Tomorrow, The Doctors, Loving, and many others keep a special place in my heart, as well. ♦ Norrth Cafe's BlogTwitterFacebook

  • rebellemckenna

    I’m happy I’m not the only one who caught the diss towards Anna Wintour…

    • Norrth

      Man what a smack to the dome. I only know that AW is supposed to rule with a iron hand. Is Geneva’s description of her accurate?

      • Jennymckitty

        Vogue isn’t known for its “think pieces” but Anna has managed it successfully for 25+ years. I doubt she could do that if she lacked intelligence.

  • Jennymckitty

    This is the most “real” reality show on these days. I enjoy watching it so much, but I think I have shed a few tears each episode. Watching women navigate real life issues instead of manufactured, production driven drama makes this show great and heartbreaking. Mica and her grandmother’s relationship reminded me so much of my relationship with my Nanny Bug. (Yes, I came up with the name). I miss her every day. I’m glad we got to meet Mica’s grandmother and share their weekend
    Daisy is such a warm, loving, positive person. I just love her. She is wrong…she’s not a cub. I picture her as a golden retriever.