It’s another rough week in the challenging world of young motherhood, difficult exes and…kindergarten!!
Leah’s first day of school is approaching, and Gary invites Amber for a milestone school supply shopping field trip. Amber missed such events while she was behind bars, and as they drive to the store,Gary tickles her playfully as he reminds her to keep her big mouth shut around his new girlfriend. The flirting is nauseating, as is Gary’s curious onlooker fueled ego, not to mention his ever-growing girth. Amber is confused by the ton-o-fun flirting, and admits to Krystal that the shopping trip was super wonderful. We jump to Gary filling his t-shirt constricted tank, while telling his brother that Leah wants her parents back together, even after he reminded her that his current love is great at “helping out.” His brother advises him to rewatch Amber’s greatest abusive hits, as Gary fondly recalls the flirty shopping tickles. Speaking of the Help….we sit in on Kristina and Gary chatting about filming challenges, as well as the slight chance of Amber clocking Kristina in front of the kids, at their school. I just can’t with this egomaniac windbag! Since the Help has gone home, Amber hotfoots it over to Gary’s for more school prep, and maybe a chubby fingered tickle.
The couple drives Leah to school, as Gary proudly waves to Kristina, practically pointing to his baby mama riding shotgun. Gary then kisses his girlfriend in front of Amber, who pronounces her day ruined, much to Gary’s delight. Amber rambles to Krystal about the lost dream of a family with the STAR of Teen Mom, as the sympathetic producer follows her around like a puppy. Gary’s family is gathered for dinner, and Leah rebuffs Amber’s phone call, as Gary’s mom eggs her on to spill that the Help is visiting. Gary’s brother tries to teach Leah that her mother is more important than cheetos, which Leah finds ridiculous. No family home is the biggest worry in Amber’s life, and she is worried that pursuing custody would pull Leah away from a stable family and a crapload of help.
Catelynn is excited that Tyler is super committed to marrying her the minute she gets her figure back, or never…whichever comes first. They head to have a gender revealing sonogram, excited to throw a party to announce the news. Tyler wants a boy badly, and Catelynn believes that he may get his wish. The big news is written on a card to be kept a surprise until later. Catelynn pours a pink smoothie, in a nice touch of MTV foreshadowing, as she reminds a rightfully frightened Tyler that she gained 60 pounds with their first child. Tyler informs her that she is massively overweight, and Catelynn lashes out, and threatens to down a whole pizza if he mentions it again. Catelynn switches gears, and reminds us that Tyler’s dad aka her stepfather, is currently serving time for assaulting her mom which later triggered a divorce. Butch sends Catelynn’s little bro Nick a slammer drawn birthday card, and it’s sad to see the young boy happily grasp at a few words from his former father figure. The three bond over their mutual loser relative, and chat about the sure to be uplifting baby that is on the way. Butch calls from the clink, and Tyler tries to describe the sad pattern that his inmate father has created. Butch comforts him by assuring him that he didn’t plan to become a career convict. Butch’s future aspirations include calling Farrah for help in breaking into the porn industry, a snarky comment designed to take the heat off of his epic failure status. Catelynn’s friend Alexa arrives for a visit, and assumes the classic ‘Teen Mom’ reclined position on the couch. The couple officially posts the big news on social media, for those who didn’t catch the news when it was leaked weeks earlier. They breathlessly watch the ‘likes’ mount, feeling proudly validated by their life decision.
The reveal party is planned for the next day. Tyler is hoping to have a son, so he can be a father that a boy can be proud of. His hopes are dashed, when the piñata spills a load of pink confetti as the gathered crowd snaps pics. Tyler tries not to show his utter disgust at his tampon and mascara laden future, as the group cheers. Tyler promises to put on a happy face as Catelynn packs on the baby weight.
Bentley is playing in the yard, while Ryan chats with his dad about the unlikelihood of attending Bentley’s launch into kindergarten. Ryan’s mom breaks the news to Maci that her son won’t be able to make the big event, as Maci commiserates with her boyfriend, Taylor over the childhood issues that Ryan’s attitudes will surely bring to their young son. Taylor wisely advises her to drink a beer, and go see a therapist.
We see Ryan and his parents lunch with Bentley, while Ryan pep talks his son, assuring him that he will hate school soon enough. His mom, Jen, encourages communication with Maci, but Ryan ignores her and snottily exits, barely saying good-bye to his boy. His father Larry is incensed, but Jen quietly shushes him, clearly not wanting to present a less than enabling front on camera. Jen is loving the lens this season, as she banters with Maci about Bentley’s big day. The day arrives, and as Maci gets her son ready, she encourages him to snag a girlfriend and learn to read…in that order. Maci is teary and later spills her guts to her therapist, letting her know that she has shacked up with her boyfriend, and the cameras have kicked back in, just in case she didn’t notice that big one in her office. She shares that Bentley has begun kindergarten, and that Ryan is a big absent jerk wad. The therapist rubs her chin, and sagely agrees that her plight is indeed difficult.
We are treated to a gritty closer look follow-up episode after the show, which is basically a snoozy rehash of what we just watched. Farrah makes an appearance and calls out the other girls as fake and not empathetic, as they watch and share their mutual disgust backstage. It is announced that she is coming back, and that she has no time for any negative energy. We will just see about that!