This week’s episode of Freak Show is about love, betrayal and secrets, and with this group, there are plenty of secrets. But Elsa prefers to categorize it as fate, destiny, and luck. Without these, we are all just spinning on a wheel. They type of wheel that has someone strapped to it while Elsa throws knives. Ethel tells Elsa she is worried about the twins. At the end of last week’s show, Elsa dropped them off at Dandy’s house, threatened by their celebrity. Elsa lies and says they snuck off when she took them dress shopping.
Dandy and Gloria are dining at home. She tells Dandy to lift the silver lid beside him. It’s prophylactics, or as we refer to them today, condoms. Dandy is disgusted. He loves Bette and Dot and would never violate them. The twins make him feel normal. Dandy wants to marry them and be together forever and ever. It’s hard to tell if Gloria likes this idea or not.
Back at the carnival grounds, the freaks are lined up with gifts for Elsa. It’s her birthday. One of the gifts isn’t shown because it’s naughty. Interesting that we can see people stabbed repeatedly, but can’t see a sex toy. One of the other gifts is Ma Petite in a knitted snuggly. Elsa loves it. It’s her cuddle bug. She’s happy but everyone else is gloomy because they miss the twins. Elsa demands less about the twins and more about the fun…especially from Sealboy, if you know what I mean.
We are reintroduced to Penny the candy-striper that was drugged and participated in the orgy. Turns out that Sealboy aka Paul, has been sneaking into her bedroom for a while, because they are in love. Good for them, but her father feels differently. Paul sneaks back out when her father starts banging on the bedroom door.
Bette and Dot are simultaneously writing in their journals. Dear Diary, Bette writes, I am so happy. I am a bird in flight. Dear Diary, Dot writes, I do not have chains, but I am in prison. Dandy serves them a smorgasbord of wonderful food, caviar included. He reads the girls an article about conjoined twins that were recently separated. Light bulb for Dot! She now knows who’s going to pay for the surgery she has been dreaming of. Soon she can be normal and run away with Jimmy!
Paul is at the drugstore trying to buy some Venetian Romance perfume. The clerk doesn’t want to sell it to him. Dandy strolls up and is upset that he can’t find two of the same hairbrushes. Paul tells Dandy that he recognizes him from the carnival. Dandy denies it. The clerk kicks Paul out of the store after Dandy accused him of pickpocketing, which is a joke in itself, but not before Paul notices that Dandy was buying two of everything. He tells Jimmy what he saw, but Jimmy is a little slow and doesn’t think that Elsa had anything to do with the twins’ disappearance. Paul informs him that Elsa would kill anyone who got in the way of her fame and that is why the twins had to go.
Dot is reading the article out loud about the separation of the conjoined twins and how one died. Dandy doesn’t like how Dot locks her diary. There should be no secrets between the three of them. He suggests that they each tell each other a secret. His secret is that he killed Twisty. Bette calls him a hero and Dot calls him a liar. This doesn’t sit well with Dandy. He rubs his temples and tells Dot that she is making him angry. He throws a temper tantrum and stomps off. He might be willing to schedule that surgery now, though I’m betting it’s not Dot who he’ll want to survive.
Stanley aka Mr. Spencer meets secretly with Maggie Esmerelda. He needs a body. He has his eyes set on Jimmy, probably because he wants to do things with those magic hands. Maggie has a better idea – Ma Petite. Quick, easy, and nothing to clean up. Just stick her in a jar of formaldehyde and put a lid on it. Stanley is impressed with Maggie’s ruthlessness, but I’m wondering, besides owing this guy money, what else does Stanley have on her? Why not read some palms and earn the money to pay him back?
Back at Elsa’s tent, Paul isn’t in the mood. He has things on his mind, he claims. Elsa can smell the Venetian Romance on him. She throws a drink in his face. Paul accuses her of taking the twins away. He tells her that everyone is talking about it. Elsa freaks out and wants all the freaks to wake up immediately. Those ingrates. After everything she’s done, this is how they repay her?
Jimmy tells Elsa to calm down – they trust her. She says prove it. How, you ask? By strapping onto the wheel so the woman having a meltdown can throw knives at you. Jimmy raises his lobster claw, but Paul stops him and says he’ll do it. Round and round he goes, where the knife stops nobody knows – though I’m thinking goodbye manhood. First one misses. Second one misses. Third one goes straight into his gut.
Maggie wakes up Ma Petite and carries her off. Ma Petite tells Maggie that she is beautiful, just like the moon. Maggie places Ma Petite in the jar, like a butterfly, and grabs the bottle of formaldehyde.
Penny the candy-striper has crept out of her home and away from her shotgun toting father to see Paul at the campground. She knew something had happened when he didn’t come to see her. Paul is with Elsa smoking the good stuff. Elsa says she won’t shed a tear if he dies. Penny rushes in and asks when the ambulance will arrive. It won’t. How soon they forget that these freaks saved their children from Twisty the Killer Clown.
When Jimmy is trying to tell Ethel that he believes Elsa had something to do with the twins disappearance, giant lady comes over to tell him that Ma Petite is missing. Just as he runs to find her, up walks Maggie proudly holding Ma Petite – and not in a jar. Maggie tells Jimmy she wants the two of them to run away together. He agrees, but says there’s something he must do first. Maggie goes to her tent to pack, but a very disappointed Stanley is waiting for her. He is now insisting on his original plan of killing Jimmy.
Back at Dandy’s house, he is sad after reading Dot’s diary and learning of her plan. He doesn’t want to buy her love. Dandy is a desert and the twins are cool streams of water. There is nothing left in him now but dust. His level of insight is remarkable, until he pulls out a large knife, and then it’s same old Dandy. He tells his mother that his purpose in life is to bring death. Just then, the door bell rings. It’s Jimmy. Dandy knows he’s there for the twins and invites him in.
Ethel is waiting for Elsa to give her a slice of birthday cake. Elsa tells Ethel that she is the sister she never had. Ethel lights the candle and tells Elsa if she ever finds out that she was lying about the twins, she will kill her with her bare hands. Elsa chuckles, then makes a wish and blows out the candle. She wishes to be loved.
Things to ponder:
- Where was Dell the Strongman this episode? Now that his boyfriend is dead, I was hoping that he and Stanley would hook up, then Dell would regret it and kill him.
- Doesn’t Gloria realize when your kid announces that his purpose in life is to bring death that it’s just a matter of time before she’ll receive it?
- When will Maggie Esmerelda actually do something other than be a prop for the other actors?
- And finally, who else misses Twisty the Killer Clown?