We are back in purgatory, I mean, gathered around the fire-pit as Nikki and Juan Pablo continue to argue about the fact that he never listens and she never gets her way. Nikki gets up and storms off. Deena and Stephanie recommend that Juan Pablo go after her. Juan Pablo doesn’t go because this is what he does. He doesn’t’ follow Nikki to reassure her. He doesn’t give the diamond ring. He doesn’t say the words, I love you.
Morning arrives and Jenna is still in her room, still pissed about the conflict that occurred between her and Dr. Jenn two days earlier, though we’ve all forgotten about it. She wants to be left alone. Her boyfriend John has no problem with this and goes to grab some food with the others. Deena asks him about Jenna and describes her as “sensitive.” John explains that Jenna fixates on things. He predicts a shit-storm tonight. Spoiler alert: There is no shit-storm with Jenna. (I’m sure that’s coming.)
Dr. Jenna has arranged something “very unique” when actually she’s done it in prior seasons so it’s not “very unique” but at least “somewhat entertaining.” Dr. Jenn introduces, Janine Driver aka The Human Lie Detector, to the group. She’s worked for the FBI and CIA as an interrogation expert. Everyone looks as if they expect to be hooked up to an electrical shock machine. This isn’t Marriage Boot Camp! For some reason, Jenna and John have been given a pass for tonight’s session and don’t have to participate.
Janine asks that they each tell her why they are here. Treach goes first. He acknowledges that he and Cicely have problems in their relationship and they are looking for an outlook to help them become a team. Janine believes him. Next is Chris. He’s there to see if he and Deena are ready to take the next step. Janine points out that Deena is touching her face and that’s called pacifying. Deena says it’s her anxiety. Janine says that when she interrogates, she is paying attention to people’s words, the tone, the pitch, the eye-blink rate, and how often the person swallows. (Gulp.)
Juan Pablo is up now and he says that he and Nikki have experienced mucho negativity. Nikki interrupts to say that they met on a dating show. Nikki came on Couple Therapy so that people could see the real them. (And we have.) Janine asks if they are their to clean up their reputation. (Yes!) Janine tells Juan Pablo that he keeps sticking out his tongue and pressing it between his lips. This is a common move that people use when lying to Congress. As if they’re saying, nanny, nanny boo-boo.
Evel Dick explains that he and Stephanie broke up ten months ago and he’s there for reason number one or it could be reason number two, he’s not sure, but it’s a major, major thing that he can’t talk about right now even though he wants to talk about it right now. Everyone is confused. Janine asks why Stephanie is so checked out. Stephanie says it’s because she feels that there was a bait and switch (Jenna-this is the correct way to use the phrase) about being at the house and has some animosity about it. Then Stephanie drops a bombshell. She says she and Evel Dick have zero, zilch, nada chance of getting back together.
It’s Cicely’s turn and she tells Janine that the last few years with Treach have been out of control. There are trust issues and Treach does nothing to make her feel secure. Cicely asks the human lie detector if she will ask Treach a question. Juan Pablo finds this fascinating and sits up taller, fluffing the pillow behind him. The question: Has Treach been faithful to Cicely in the past year? Dun, dun, duuuun. The show goes to commercial.
We’re back. Before Treach answers, Evel Dick tells us that this is wrong. It’s a little reminiscent of Jerry Springer and Maury Povich, but who are we to judge? Treach says that he has been faithful. And there’s no lightening strike, so Janine believes him. She says that it’s because Treach didn’t get defensive and go all gangsta. Golden nugget of advice from Janine: Truthful people convey. Liars try to convince. Having said that, Treach is an accomplished actor and Cicely isn’t buying what they’re selling.
There’s one last activity for the couples under their chair. It’s a yellow card with 1 to 100% written on it. The object is to mark on the scale the percentage of honesty they gave tonight. The only couple focused on is Juan Pablo and Nikki. Juan Pablo marked it at 100% and Nikki marked hers at 90%. Reason being, why bother giving 100% when the person you’re with isn’t. Sheesh. Once again I ask, can these two be voted off? The human lie detector asks if Juan Pablo loves Nikki. And he says…nothing. Damn these commercials!
When we return, Juan Pablo says that not saying I love you is a cultural thing. Apparently Americans are too loose with this saying. When pressed, Juan Pablo says that although he’s falling for Nikki, he doesn’t love her. Through the tears, Nikki asks when will she be good enough? Dr. Jenn tells her to stay open to the experience so that she may become a bitter better person. In their room, Juan Pablo is telling Nikki that he “jus don know how to splain it. You don jus say I mucho love you to someone in the street.” This is the difference between American and Venezuelans – the truth according to Juan Pablo.
Cicely is in her room and Treach is outside playing 8-ball. He’s pissed. He thinks what Cicely did was out of line. John says that he’s glad that he and Jenna didn’t have to go and got to hide in there room like something else is going on that they don’t want the viewers to know about. Treach’s point is that after hearing that he passed the human lie detector’s test, Cicely didn’t say one grateful word. And he’s not going to run after her. No ma’am. She’s going to have to run after him. Her take: Treach should admit to cheating. His take: He’s been officially acquitted.
Evel and Stephanie and Chris and Deena are talking smack about Juan Pablo. Evel now understands why everyone thinks Juan Pablo’s a douche bag. Deena, who was on Team Pablo, is now on Team Nikki. Evel predicts that Juan Pablo and Nikki are doomed. Oh, say it isn’t so.
The following morning Jenna steps out of her crypt and joins the ladies at the table. She has a gallon of make up on and a ring that, no kidding, looks like a butt plug. Cicely reads Jenna for missing last night’s session while they were put through the wringer. Jenna could care less. So she says, but something tells me Jenna will soon return to her room and lament over Cicely’s resentment.
The group is wondering what’s up with Dick. There is actual concern, but Nikki tells everyone to get over it, he’ll talk when he’s ready. Sounds like someone who originally claimed not to like the cameras suddenly doesn’t want the cameras on anyone else. Cicely tells Nikki that she and Evel have a connection, biotch, and if Cicely wants to worry, she will.
Group session is called and we learn that in a previous private meeting with Stephanie, Dick, and Dr. Jenn, Stephanie has finally consented to Dick revealing HIS disease to the group. Evel tells them about the blood test on Season 13 of Big Brother. There is shock in the room. He says that this is the last relationship he will ever have. Tears fall from everyone as Evel tells his housemates that he’s HIV positive.
I am so lucky to combine blogging with my guilty pleasure of watching reality TV. I read all the comments and respond to most. Feel free to reach out to me. If you like fiction, I have two published novels: Three Days in Purgatory and A Reason to Run.