On this week’s episode of “Botched,” we first meet Mike, a personal trainer from a quaint part of Michigan, who has an embarrassingly jagged 11-inch monster scar on the back of his head: he is the victim of a hair transplant gone rogue. At the tender age of 23 his hairline receded. He never gave it much thought until he moved to LA and everyone had a full head of hair regardless of their age, genetics, etc. Hoping for a remedy, Mike found a surgeon who purported to be the best hair transplant specialist in all of LaLa land – and his fancy Beverly Hills address seemed to back his boasts.
But the morning of the scheduled hair transplant graft in Beverly Hills, Mike’s bait and switch surgeon moved the procedure venue to a less posh hood. The non-90210 doc removed an unorthodoxy chunky graft of his skin, leaving the back of his head looking like a Frankenstein smile.
As Mike meets Dr. Dubrow and Dr. Nassif, he laments his heady woes. His desire to fix his cranial surface is not entirely superficial; as a personal trainer, his appearance is a major part of his career.
His noticeable scar attracts a lot of comments and questions in public, he explains away it away in a variety of colorful ways: brain surgery, shark bite, insert heroic adventure here. And if he braves admitting to his scar being the result of vanity follicle-related plastic surgery, feels it makes him sound like “douche.”
Both the Dr’s agree that they need to expand the tissue on his head by inserting a balloon beneath his skin in order to reduce the width of his scar.
The idea of a breast implant makes his head spin – but both docs reassure him yet remind him of the significant improvements in store for him. Get pumped and keep your eye on the prize, Mike!
Since their patient is a personal trainer, Dr. Nassif is asking all about his workout routine and running tips. Dr. Dubrow teases him that the only place Dr. Nassif is running to is the the dinner table!
As the doctors implant the bulbous skin expander, they ask Mike how bad the pain is on a scale of one to ten and he answers – “I’m about to freak out!” Dr. Dubrow reminds him “you wanted a breast implant in the back of your head, and you got it.” Mike jokingly requests a nipple be placed on his boob head. With only a hint of irony, Dr. Dubrow replies, “don’t tempt me.” As each episode of “Botched” warns us: Be careful what you ask for!
Next we meet Michelle, the daughter of a preacher, who looks a bit Stifler’s mom filtered through a Telemundo lens. She reveals that she was very pretty as a young girl but a horse kicked her in the face leaving her disfigured. Michelle underwent ten surgeries in a futile quest to regain her comely countenance. In the Philippines she had a facelift and a cleft put in her chin for a mere $200. But she discovers you really do get what you pay for as she is extremely dissatisfied with the results.
Now she wants to remove the chin implant. Could this be an actual worthy case for the doctors? Who could not sympathize?
Our third patient is Cindy, who exclaims, by way of introduction, “When I was growing up I didn’t want a pony, I wanted boobs!” She is a former beauty queen turned breast cancer survivor. She has camouflaged the scars of her breast reconstruction with a lotus tattoo, but she yearns to restore symmetry to her original bust line. Her memories of her childhood are interesting to say the least – her pageant mom doted on her, treated her as a “little Jon Benet” and told her she couldn’t wait for her to develop so she could dress her in more designer clothes. Questionable parenting much?
During Cindy’s consultation, the doctors note that her boobs are a bit too close together, with webbed skin connecting them, which makes the one that is tattooed move like a fifth limb. However they’re confident that they can “fix all of her moving parts.”
Next, we cut back to the consultation room where the docs are interviewing Michelle. Although she wants to improve her horse kick “pulverized” appearance by removing the artificial cleft in her chin, the doctors decide it isn’t worth the risk. Instead, they send her on her way with some encouraging words about self acceptance.
When we return to Cindy’s breast saga, she is getting prepped for the operating room, incredibly supportive husband in tow. What begins as a routine surgery turns risky when the doctors discover that Cynthia’s left implant has “exploded.” Once again, Dr. Dubrow keeps a cool head. He removes the excess silicone and bestows Cindy with the pair of breasts she has been longing for since her recovery from cancer…ahem, since childhood actually.
After the break we see Cindy and her husband in the post-op exam room. She has refused to take her meds, and consequently is in a lot of pain. Dr. Dubrow prescribes a pill cocktail of the “good stuff,” dubbing himself her “Surgical bartender.”
We return to Mike just as he is getting the balloon on his head deflated. Mike is still not entirely satisfied with the results – as he still has some scarring on the back of his head. The pain he endured from the temporarily expanded headspace might not have been worth it. Tons of pain – no gain. Still, the doctors had warned him that his head might have some residual scarring.
There is better news for Cindy – who is excited to show off her new bod to friends and family. She has got her sexy back.
“I can just throw on a regular bra,” she gushes, as she relaxes by the pool in a blue bikini and heels. “I’m so empowered!”
Tune-in to an all-new “Botched” Sunday, August 10 at 10:30/9:30c on E!